Keeping up?

'Keeping up with the Joneses'

It is worth nothing for you to have the whole world if you yourself are lost. (Mark 8:36)

There used to be a saying that implicated the "Joneses'" as having so much and everyone trying to keep up with them. While the saying may not be as popular today, the desire to 'keep up' is always around us in society. We are marketed the fastest internet, the most expansive cell and data plans, the best hotel accommodations, and the biggest houses with the most 'toys' to enjoy on the weekends. Regardless of the current 'trends', the root problem still is man's extreme 'pride'. We desire some of the 'worst' things for ourselves, all because someone else has it or is doing it. All the while, Jesus is just sitting there asking for us to take as much interest in him as we do in 'keeping up'!

Did you realize that the phrase, "Keeping us with the Joneses" actually dates back to 1913? It has been around for over 100 years and actually emerged in a time we don't think of as being all that 'affluent' or 'cutting edge'. The phrase stems from the 'race' to outdo one's neighbor - not in spiritual terms, but in physical objects, the size of the home, the contents of one's home, or the income one attained from one's advancing career. The 'race' began in the late 1800's and was coined the 'rat race' sometime later. The desire for more and more became common place. The extreme exhaustion of competition is seldom acknowledged by those engaging in such a competitive manner, though. 

Competition in this world just seems to keep coming. If we are going to always strive to 'keep up' with the competition, we will soon be exhausted by all the striving required. What most fail to recognize is the 'circular' motion such competition takes. One 'achieves' this or that, but soon finds the achievement is 'outdated' and he is no longer 'keeping up', so he must set out to achieve all over again. God's good news is that there is no competition in his Kingdom. All are equally sinners - all are equally in need of a Savior. All enter into his Kingdom through grace - no amount of 'keeping up' work is required in order to 'advance' or 'be out front'. In fact, God actually says those who would be last will be the ones who will 'move on up' in the end! Just sayin!

How do you see me?

Abraham Lincoln once said that 'tact is the ability to describe others as they see themselves.' If you are anything like me, the 'brutality' of that honesty can sometimes sting! I don't always see myself through the eyes of Jesus, although I should. There are times when I see myself through the eyes of others - giving into their harsh judgments about the way I am behaving. In school, that got me into a whole lot of trouble! I would do things contrary to what I knew to be right just because I wanted to be 'accepted' by the 'in crowd'. I did things I wasn't comfortable doing. I followed - they led. There is but one leader worth following - Christ. There is but one estimation of our worth and goodness that really matters - Christ's. None of us 'better' or 'worse' than the next person, but we sometimes think we are. It might just be time to see ourselves through the eyes of Jesus just a bit more - seeing ourselves through the eyes of others just a bit less.

But what happens when we live God’s way? He brings gifts into our lives, much the same way that fruit appears in an orchard—things like affection for others, exuberance about life, serenity. We develop a willingness to stick with things, a sense of compassion in the heart, and a conviction that a basic holiness permeates things and people. We find ourselves involved in loyal commitments, not needing to force our way in life, able to marshal and direct our energies wisely. Legalism is helpless in bringing this about; it only gets in the way. Since this is the kind of life we have chosen, the life of the Spirit, let us make sure that we do not just hold it as an idea in our heads or a sentiment in our hearts, but work out its implications in every detail of our lives. That means we will not compare ourselves with each other as if one of us were better and another worse. We have far more interesting things to do with our lives. Each of us is an original. (Galatians 5:22-26)

What gets in the way of you seeing yourself the way Jesus sees you? Do the taunting memories of your past keep creeping into your present view of yourself? If so, it is likely that others see those 'memories' being rehashed in our lives, as well. If someone were to tell you that is not the way Jesus sees you, would you believe them? They aren't comparing you - they are wanting you to be free of those past hurts, hang-ups, and halting memories. God's plan is for us to live free - no longer bound by those things that described our 'past life'. Maybe Lincoln was a little off-base because when you describe how Jesus sees me, I am more inclined to walk in that truth!

Gifts are given - fruit is born - attitudes change. This is the pattern God establishes in our lives. As you may very well be aware, our attitude toward ourselves can be a little less than kind at times. The more we listen to what God says about us, the more we will see our attitude about our past change. We don't give it as much 'credence' as we once did. We see it as 'over and done with' - no longer holding us captive. Scripture has a way of opening our minds to the possibilities of a different 'view' of ourselves - but it must be embraced. Each of us is an original, so why do we always want to 'conform' to some pattern set out for us by others? Perhaps we are placing too much emphasis on how others see us and not quite enough on how Christ sees us. Just sayin!

Headed into stress

God helping you: Take your everyday, ordinary life—your sleeping, eating, going-to-work, and walking-around life—and place it before God as an offering. Embracing what God does for you is the best thing you can do for him. Don’t become so well-adjusted to your culture that you fit into it without even thinking. Instead, fix your attention on God. You’ll be changed from the inside out. Readily recognize what he wants from you, and quickly respond to it. Unlike the culture around you, always dragging you down to its level of immaturity, God brings the best out of you, develops well-formed maturity in you. (Romans 12:1-2)

The way we think is the determining factor in how we perceive the circumstance in front of us right now. In changing the 'way' we think, we can be transformed. When we ask God, he tends to give us a different perspective than we've been seeing through our own eyes. There are some of us who go through life just feeling like 'come what may', we are stuck with it - there just isn't anything else we could have done about whatever it is we are facing. We don't live by some "chance" encounter or outcome (fate). We live by faith - based on a firmer foundation than kismet. Sometimes we live with a whole lot more stress in our lives than we really need to - simply because we think the stress is coming from outside of us. Stress is something INSIDE of us - it comes from the way we think and the choices we make as a result of our thinking. One of the easiest ways to get out from under the pressure of stress is to "reframe" our thinking. We want to discount the actual "benefit" of stress - seeing it as a bad thing and something to be avoided. Stress is really God's way of speaking to us - it is a means of getting our attention. It is a signal of sorts - to get us to see things from his perspective. We are not going to see things differently until something gets our attention which will cause us to question the way we are seeing them. This is how God uses stress in our lives - it begins to get us asking questions - and God can use those questions! If we understand what causes stress, we might hear the questions a little clearer and a little faster!

Stress come whenever we find ourselves making compromises. Anytime there is a struggle between what is "right" or "wrong" in our lives, we find ourselves encountering some of the feelings we associate with stress. Even when we choose to take the path of "right", we often feel like we aren't stress-free. Why? It is a good kind of stress! Stress actually pushes us beyond the last place we were. If you think of muscles, they only develop strength when we push them beyond what they are "used to" doing - they need a little stress to get them "toned". Even with the path of "right" there will be stressful challenges designed to help us develop. Two things come out of this "good stress" - a building of integrity (foundation) and a letting go of control (trust). Stress is present anytime there is conflict within relationships. This type of stress is usually related to someone's selfish choices. When the other person can see things only their way (or perhaps it is you who sees things this way) - it is that way which makes sense to them, and they don't quite understand why the other party cannot see things the same way they do. Conflict has started! Then there comes this belief that no one understands where you are coming from - unreasonable as though it may be, not everyone will be able to think exactly like you think! Conflict takes root! Changing our perspective can help us see our selfishness and open us up to the possibility of another's viewpoint.

Stress increases as we sense of any form of "competition" within either the relationship or the circumstances. If you don't believe me, watch a family play a rousing game of Monopoly sometime. Someone wants Park Place or Boardwalk - when they get it, they manage to buy all those houses and hotels, causing the rent on that tiny square to skyrocket to astronomical values. Landing on that space almost bankrupts the other players. What does the other guy do to offset his losses? He buys up lots and lots of other property, getting monopolies on those properties until he can garner some monies of his own from others landing on his investments. The one property has some value, but when you "own it all", the value multiplies! Competition at its finest! At the core of all this competition is something we might not recognize - comparison. You own this, I don't. You own that, I don't. You have a monopoly, I don't. Competition also involves making value judgments about what the other guy is doing and why. We see things as "against" us - every move is designed in some way to "take us down". If you don't think this increases stress, just drag out the Monopoly game! When competition enters the picture, what we forget is the truth of God's grace and favor - they aren't given because we compete to get them. They are given because he loves us first! Competition always puts grace out of the picture - compassion brings grace to life! Not sure what is getting at you 'internally' today, but I do know a change of perspective might be in order. Just sayin!

Better than or worse than?

Have you ever been accused of taking yourself too seriously? It could be you just cannot get past the bad habit of thinking of yourself as superior in some way, or deserving of more distinction than someone else for something you may have done. For some reason, you might find yourself getting a little pretentious, attempting over and over again to win someone's affections, or receive some kind of 'merit' by pushing your 'good deeds' as 'deserving' of some kind of notice. Since I could put myself in this boat on occasion, let me just say that it might not have occurred to any of us yet, but it could just be that those 'good deeds' we are counting on as getting us some kind of 'merit' with another are really what was reasonable in the first place - they weren't really all that 'above and beyond' actions on our part. There are times we push ourselves forward, demanding something more than we should, and it makes others uncomfortable. There are also times when we just get way too down on ourselves, not wanting to give ourselves any credit at all, and then others are always trying to encourage us to see ourselves differently. Either way, it isn't how God wants us to see ourselves - because it isn't the way he sees us if Christ dwells in us. He wants us to take him seriously - not ourselves!

How can I stand up before God and show proper respect to the high God? Should I bring an armload of offerings topped off with yearling calves? Would God be impressed with thousands of rams, with buckets and barrels of olive oil? Would he be moved if I sacrificed my firstborn child, my precious baby, to cancel my sin? But he’s already made it plain how to live, what to do, what God is looking for in men and women. It’s quite simple: Do what is fair and just to your neighbor, be compassionate and loyal in your love, and don’t take yourself too seriously—take God seriously. (Micah 6:4-8 MSG)

The offerings were to be of the 'first-fruits' of the fields and flocks. The best of the best - so to speak. The farmer or rancher would wait all season to bring forth that crop or see the firstborn emerge from the flock or herd. The season just prior to the first of the crop may have been the leanest for them - making it especially significant that God asked for the first-fruits to be given to him. The farmer would have likely desired to partake of those first-fruits himself - because of the leanness of the times preceding their harvest or emergence. The reminder to the farmer or rancher was that all the 'yield' of the season was a direct blessing from God - a direct result of his work within their lives. To give back just a little of that increase really was just a way of showing God we knew exactly where the increase came from! The truth has always been that God desires our best - first. He has equally always made a way for us to give our best - first! He also makes a way for us to continually be our best - Christ.

In respect to the harvest or increase of the flocks, the idea is that of honoring not only God, but also each other with the increase. The increase isn't just for our own edification or enhancement. It is given to us because there will always be others who will benefit from what God has blessed us with in our lives. It matters not if the thing God brings as an increase in our lives is his grace or love - gift it! It doesn't matter if that increase is some form of knowledge or intelligence - use it to help others! The increase has always been about us giving, not about us being 'better than' or 'more blessed'. It has always been about us honoring God with the increase, and in turn honoring others with an outflow of that blessing. In this way, we are keeping our focus right - God is the one who gives the increase, he is also the one who wants us to use that increase to be a blessing in the lives of those around us.

Some may not have had much of a harvest or increase in their flocks or herds. The times may have been way too lean for their liking, making it harder and harder for them to find ways to be fed, clothed, and housed during those times. God never 'let them off the hook' when it came to the sacrifice - he required something. But...he made adjustments in what they could offer. If they didn't have a lamb, they could give a dove. If they didn't have oil, they could bring salt. They may not have found they had much to give, but God provided something they could bring - something that they could give. As is the case with us, we always have something to give of ourselves - regardless of how little or much it may be. We can always bless another is some way - it just may take a different form from time to time. 

None of us is 'more blessed' or 'better than' another - all of us who have Christ have it all! Circumstances may change our 'increase' in some way or another, but they never change who or what we are in Christ. We all have been created with a place for his Spirit to dwell - all have an equal chance to say "yes" to him. All have a similar 'framework' - born into sin, sinners at the core, and in need of a Savior. That puts all of us on a pretty even playing field, my friends. None is better than, or worse than - - - we are just the same! Just sayin!

Be yourself

Some of us have quite a struggle with comparing ourselves to others. Are we thinner or fatter than that other person? Do our earnings outdo theirs? Does our sense of style reveal we have at least kept up with the current century while others have lagged behind? We engage in all manner of comparison and that moment we begin to compare ourselves to another is the moment we open ourselves up to envy, jealousy, strife, and riffs in relationship. Why is that? I think it just might be that Christ never intended for us to compare ourselves to another human - because we are ALL flawed in some manner. His intent was that we compliment each other - not compete!

In this way we are like the various parts of a human body. Each part gets its meaning from the body as a whole, not the other way around. The body we’re talking about is Christ’s body of chosen people. Each of us finds our meaning and function as a part of his body. But as a chopped-off finger or cut-off toe we wouldn’t amount to much, would we? So since we find ourselves fashioned into all these excellently formed and marvelously functioning parts in Christ’s body, let’s just go ahead and be what we were made to be, without enviously or pridefully comparing ourselves with each other, or trying to be something we aren’t. (Romans 12:4-5 MSG)

We get our meaning from Christ - no one else. We find our purpose in him - not in our achievements. We might get enjoyment in our achievement, but it isn't our crowning glory - Christ in us is that crowning glory! We aren't made complete through human effort or restraint. We are complete in Christ. This is the starting point of all sense of real purpose in our lives. When we engage in comparison, we are always going to look down on someone (it might even be ourselves). We might not realize that at first, but when the toe starts to demand all the attention because it gets a little ingrown nail artifact, how much of the body's attention does it get? ALL of it - small though it might be - it views itself as most important at that moment!

Hear the words of this scripture clearly, my friends. We are ALL excellently formed and we function in a marvelous fashion not on our own, but because we have been joined into this thing called the Body of Christ. In times gone by, churches used to preach that we were the Body of Christ. You don't much hear that message any longer, but the truth still remains - each part makes up the whole. No part is more important - nor is any part less significant. ALL are necessary to what God intends. The main message in this passage isn't that we were all put into the Body of Christ, but that we are to get good and comfortable just being who we were made to be - without pretense, comparison, or fear!

Too often comparison leads to us being or striving to be something we are not. We try fashions that we just aren't all that comfortable wearing just because we are trying to "keep up". We buy into neighborhoods that put a crunch on our budgets just because everyone else is doing it. We find ourselves extending ourselves in ways we just aren't comfortable with just because others expect it of us. The end result is that we are miserable. We find ourselves striving, but getting very little reward from all the effort. Did you realize that to strive is to not only to engage in serious effort, expending serious amounts of energy, but that it also means we are struggling in opposition. The opposition is really our conscience! We know better, but we are doing it in order to 'keep up'.

The more we try to be what we are really quite uncomfortable being, the less true we become to our 'original design' - who we were created to be. The greatest way to honor God in our lives is not by becoming the other guy - it is by being ourselves! Just sayin!

Oversized Wishbones

Robert Frost once quipped, "A person will sometimes devote all his life to the development of one part of his body - the wishbone." So true, isn't it? We find ourselves saying thing such as, "I wish I could...", "I wish I had...",  or even "I wish I hadn't..." In the dreams of tomorrow and the wistful contemplation of our yesterday, we find ourselves "wishing" our lives away! Our psalmist was having one of those moments where he began to envy all the things he saw those around him doing, acquiring, and being given - his words might just betray our hearts a little, as well. "For I envied the proud when I saw them prosper despite their wickedness. They seem to live such painless lives; their bodies are so healthy and strong. They don’t have troubles like other people; they’re not plagued with problems like everyone else."  Have you ever found yourself saying something similar to this? We don't "get" how some people "get all the breaks in life", while others just seem to go on and on in their little worlds with all the problems that come their way. Then in a short period of time, with God's grace and help, we come to the realization of just how greatly we are blessed, despite the "absence" of the "things" we might have once envied in their lives!

I was so foolish and ignorant—I must have seemed like a senseless animal to you. Yet I still belong to you; you hold my right hand.  You guide me with your counsel, leading me to a glorious destiny. Whom have I in heaven but you? I desire you more than anything on earth.  My health may fail, and my spirit may grow weak, but God remains the strength of my heart; he is mine forever.  (Psalm 73:22-26 NLT)

We can "wish" forever, but in the end, it isn't wishing that accomplishes anything in our lives - it is the putting forth of the effort to see the thing accomplished. God isn't just going to deliver all of life's "things" to us on a silver platter - there is something to be done on our part with all aspects of his blessing. We may not realize it, but even the changing of our attitude takes some effort! We don't get a different mindset because God brainwashes us! We choose our mindset and we choose the attitude of gratitude - regardless of the circumstances we are in at the moment. Do you know what turns us away from comparing ourselves and circumstances to the "outcomes" of another's life? It is this attitude of gratitude. That may seem simple, but it is so true! Once we begin to settle into the grace of God within our own lives, the "things" or "privileges" of another's life just pale in comparison!

Our psalmist spoke from a heart as genuine as could be - he admits to the struggles with envy and comparison he engaged in just as much as each of us struggle with those same comparisons. We just aren't all that different from each other, are we? We all get wrapped up in this "comparison" thing from time to time. We all have the ability to get ourselves all bent out of shape because another seems to be "doing so well" in comparison to what is happening in our lives at the moment. As I sat at the memorial service for my dear sister-in-law this past week, one thing struck me that her daughter shared. She recounted the repeated times (and there were many) over all the years of struggle that her mother received that "crappy diagnosis" that she wasn't counting on - the cancer was back again or hadn't shrunk despite the aggressive treatment regime. Each and every time, as her daughter so perfectly described it, she faced that "crappy diagnosis" with grace and determination. She could have compared herself to others who got the "glowing reports" of "cancer-free", but she didn't. She pressed on, in spite of odds that were declared to be totally against her. 

When we exercise our "wishbone" too aggressively, our "comparison buttons" are pushed all too easily, my friend. When we settle into the day-to-day living of life in the measure of grace we are given for each day, despite the "prognosis of the day", we begin to find our focus isn't on what we don't have, but what lies right in front of us. If that be Jesus - what more could we need? Just sayin!

ALL not ONE

If you have ever formed a higher opinion of yourself than what another might see, I don't think you are alone.  In fact, there are times in our lives when we just naturally think of ourselves as doing a better job than another, performing a bit stronger than another, or just plain more beautiful or handsome than another.  What is happening when we are forming this "self opinion"?  We are comparing ourselves to another's appearance, performance, or accomplishments.  Risky business, at best, because we ALWAYS stand the chance someone will come along who out-performs, out-shines, and out-classes us!  Perhaps this is why scripture warns us against such comparison, but it is also why scripture reminds us of our "equality" as human beings.  ALL have fallen short of the glory of God.  ALL have sinned.  ALL have no ability to get this redemption thing right under their own power.  ALL need a Savior. Plain and simple - none of us out-performs, out-shines, or out-classes another in this thing called grace!

God has given me a special gift, and that is why I have something to say to each one of you. Don’t think that you are better than you really are. You must see yourself just as you are. Decide what you are by the faith God has given each of us.  Each one of us has one body, and that body has many parts. These parts don’t all do the same thing. In the same way, we are many people, but in Christ we are all one body. We are the parts of that body, and each part belongs to all the others.  (Romans 12:3-5 ERV)

Paul is writing to the Roman church, new believers all of them.  None is above the rest in this thing called "faith" - no one has outdone the other on this road to salvation.  He reminds them of this fact because it is truly a dangerous thing to allow this "root of comparison" or "one-upsmanship" to take hold in a group of believers.  There is enough of this in the dog-eat-dog world we live in without it also being a part of our community of faith!  If we dissect this a little, we get some insight into the matter which might just be a little helpful in keeping us from drifting into this dangerous territory:

- Comparison begins in the mind.  Whenever we are "assigning" degrees of superiority, inferiority, quality, quantity, or intensity, we are really doing this in our minds.  We form certain opinions - which originate in the processes of thought - and those opinions are "attached" to the object we are focusing upon.  When we stand in front of the open refrigerator or pantry cabinet, we are going through this process of comparison - assigning or attaching an "value" to whatever it is we are viewing before us.  There is fruit, some vegetables in the crisper, and maybe even a carton of milk or juice.  Yet, we will assign a higher value to the leftover fried chicken, or perhaps the pudding cup in the snack keeper on the door.  Why?  We have formed certain opinions over time which are based on what makes us "feel" a certain way when we eat those items.  Fried chicken or a pudding cup may go down pretty well at first, but enough of these and our we wonder who shrunk our pants in the wash! When we "assign" degrees of "quality" to an individual, we are in dangerous territory.  God considers no man or woman above or below another.  His stand is that he "so loved the world" - not this man or this woman - but the world at large!  No one falls short of his attention - so no one rises to a place of greater appeal or focus.  ALL of us are important to God.

- The best means of examining oneself is by use of a good mirror.  As I have grown a little older, what I see in my bathroom mirror is not always as "flattering" as what I used to see!  As "reliable" as my bathroom mirror has been in showing me where I have wayward little hairs on my chin just begging to be plucked, or hairs out of place on my head, it has proven to be very unreliable to reveal the condition of my heart and mind.  Other than an occasional "image" of myself with a distressed look on my face, or the recognition my shoulders are sagging a bit under some heavy load, the bathroom mirror is quite ineffective in revealing the true nature of my "state of health" - especially emotionally and spiritually.  The Word of God is the only true mirror which can get to the "heart" of the matter!  As I look into the words penned there, I often find things brought into focus which were a little blurry to me before.  The scripture is not just the best way to see our true selves, it is the best way to avoid comparing ourselves to another.  When we see how we align with the character of God, we are ALL humbled!

- The value of another is often based on the importance we place in their contribution to the "whole", but we must remember their value may be "masked" at times.  I don't recognize the significance of my little toe until I stub it on the nightstand!  I don't appreciate the length of my fingernails until I need to pick up needle from the counter top.  I don't recognize the strength and thickness of my hair until I begin to see them gathering in the sink and on the floor while I dress in the morning.  Sometimes we "see" others all around us and form an opinion of their value based on what we "assess" at the moment.  If there is a need to "use" their particular talent, we see their value as significant - if not, we just might gloss over their importance (much as we do our little toe and fingernails).  I don't "need" all of the ingredients in my spice cabinet all at one time, but I "benefit" from all of them being there when I am creating a dish to be enjoyed by all at dinner!  God's placement of individuals in our lives within this community of faith may not be apparent all at once, but given the opportunity, each member's contribution to the whole will become apparent over time.  We ALL serve a part in God's family.

The community in which we grow together is one in which God reveals certain strengths and weaknesses of each member.  As we are growing together, we must never lose sight of the dangers of comparing one to another.  This "assigning" of value or worth based on what we see on the "outside" of an individual is indeed dangerous territory (and a place where God does not want his kids to go).  When we allow the mirror of God's Word to reveal the truths of his grace in the lives of those around us, we find there is much the same in ALL of us.  Just sayin!

Getting other than what we deserved!

There is something unique about a thankful heart.  If you have ever been around someone who really practices a lifestyle of gratitude, you know what I mean.  Another word for gratitude is gratefulness.  I sometimes think this character trait is linked to a similar trait - being graceful.  Grateful people have a way of exuding grace in some of the most unlikely ways, don't they? Our "G" list of character traits - grace and gratitude.

Let the peace of Christ keep you in tune with each other, in step with each other. None of this going off and doing your own thing. And cultivate thankfulness. Let the Word of Christ—the Message—have the run of the house. Give it plenty of room in your lives. Instruct and direct one another using good common sense. And sing, sing your hearts out to God! Let every detail in your lives—words, actions, whatever—be done in the name of the Master, Jesus, thanking God the Father every step of the way.  (Colossians 3:15-17 MSG)

As Paul writes to the Colossian church, he focuses on something which keeps people together - focusing on "staying in tune with each other".  In other words, we don't always choose our own path and just plunge down it without regard to the feelings of another.  We call this being "graceful" - there is a "beauty" inherent in the movements of people of grace.  Why?  They look beyond themselves and see those God has placed in their path.  They "give the Word of God room in their lives".  What happens when God's Word actually gets into the nooks and crevices of our lives - it challenges us, convinces us, and eventually changes us.  We become people of grace!

A natural outflow of truly experiencing grace in your own life is to develop the complimentary trait of being grateful.  This is because we are deeply affected by the grace of God - it touches us deeply and we have to give expression to things which touch us this deeply.  If we are in the habit of burying our emotions, this expression of gratitude might be just a little muted, but it is there, nonetheless.  The thing about gratitude is it is really an attitude - it is not something conjured up - it stems from within.  

Grace moves upon us - gratitude comes from within us.  It is the outflow of grace.  I think of this as grace priming the pump for a tremendous outflow of amazement, awe, and adoration.  Gratitude is the basis of worship - for we truly don't worship what we are not thankful for in our lives.  Don't believe me?  Let someone take away that ONE thing in your physical environment which you take such delight in.  It might be the best mattress you have ever slept on, the nicest car you have driven, or perhaps the biggest TV you have ever watched.  Now, it is gone.  How'd ya sleep?  Did you enjoy getting to work quite as much on the bike as you did in the car?  Did the game seem as exciting when you had to listen to it on a radio?  Gratitude is the basis of worship - not that I am saying we should worship ANYTHING in our physical environment, but it helps to make my point.  We appreciate what we have, so when it is gone, we mourn its loss (we don't have an attitude of gratitude).

Gratitude is the basis of worship in our spiritual lives - based on the actions of grace in our lives.  They go hand-in-hand.  God moves upon us, we experience his movement - the "outflow" should be gratitude.  Yet some of us have a tough time with this trait - our attitude kind of stinks.  We get into this issue of "comparing" ourselves with others and when we see they "get" something better than we do, or seem to be "getting along" better, we get a little down in the dumps.  This is the sad thing about comparing - it changes our attitude toward what it is we DO have!  Maybe this is why Paul tells us we have to "cultivate" this attitude of gratitude - it takes effort to maintain our focus on what God is doing in US and not looking to what he is doing in OTHERS!  Just as important as it is for us to not just go our own way and do our own thing, it is equally important for us to not be looking with envy upon what another person has, is experiencing, or has come through.

It is a narrow line between envy and encouragement.  I can be encouraged by your blessing, but the very moment I begin to cross-over into the space where I start to wonder "why not me", I move into envy.  Envy destroys gratitude, and it limits the actions of grace in our lives.  It is to be guarded against - this is why Paul tells the Galatian church to "Make a careful exploration of who you are and the work you have been given, and then sink yourself into that. Don’t be impressed with yourself. Don’t compare yourself with others. Each of you must take responsibility for doing the creative best you can with your own life."  (Galations 6:4-5 MSG)  This is the crux of the matter - gratitude focuses on the grace we have been given, sinking deeply into the place of appreciating even the smallest hint of its work, and then enjoying it with all the gusto we have.  Yep, we can be excited about what God is doing in the lives of others - in fact, we are told to celebrate with them.  We just need to guard carefully our tendency to then drift into comparing what God is doing there with what he is doing in us!

Grace is undeserved - gratitude is an expression of awe at receiving something other than what we deserved!  Just sayin!

Spot the Differences?

Oh, that my steps might be steady, keeping to the course you set; 
   then I'd never have any regrets in comparing my life with your counsel. 

(Psalm 119:5-6 The Message)

What is it you compare your life to?  Is it another individual?  Perhaps it is a set of rules or standards you strive to adhere to.  Or maybe it is an illusion of perfection you set up as a "desired outcome".  Either way, you will be disappointed in comparing your "progress" in life to any of these!  When we compare ourselves to others, we can do one of two things - either we get really humbled by their actions (making us feel guilty), or we feel like we showed them up (making us feel really proud).  If we spend all our time trying to "live by the rules", we sometimes get so bogged down in the rules we miss the life that is happening all around us.  Most of us have had some type of illusion of perfection in our minds at one time or another - it does not take much to burst our bubble on that one!

David is very clear - the only thing worth "comparing" our life to is the Word of God (his counsel).  When we have a reliable standard by which to "measure" something, we are not disappointed with the results.  I began today with some pretty "unreliable" standards by which we can "measure" the course of our lives.  We have a much more trustworthy standard in the wise counsel of our Creator!  Who better to give us the directions by which to live than the one who did the creating in the first place?

As we digest these verses a little, I'd like us to focus on the word "compare" for a few moments.  When we understand what we are doing when we "compare", we might get a little insight into what it is that God has provided for us in his Word.

- When we compare something, we are examining it side-by-side with something else.  In other words, we examine it to see both the similarities or the differences between the two.  David says that when we put our lives up alongside the counsel God offers (the Word of God), it points out some of the similarities and differences within our lives.  That is a good thing!  When we know where we are the same - we can rejoice.  When we know where God needs to spend some time on those areas that stand out as "differences", we can take heart that his Word never returns to him without accomplishing what it set out to accomplish!

- The process of making a comparison is usually for the purpose of finding the quality or value in the object being compared.  For example, when we find a coin that dates back fifty or more years in age, we might go to the internet to find a coin collector's website.  Then we input the information about our "old coin" in hopes that when we compare what we are holding in our hand to that which is displayed on the screen, we will discover that we have something of infinitely more worth (value) than just the "stated" value of the coin.  That old "penny" suddenly takes on VALUE because of what the coin collector "reports" about the coin we hold.  The same thing happens when we compare our lives with the Word of God - God declares the VALUE of what he beholds as worth much more than the "stated" value of our lives!

David reminds us of the steps of a righteous man (or woman) - they are steady and they are progressive.  I have said it before - it is not in the beginning that we realize our path - it is in the finishing!  Value is sometimes not fully realized until a full examination is completed.  That old coin is turned over and over - examining edges, wear on the images displayed, the "mint" markings, and the period in which it was produced.  When we lay our lives out, making comparison of our walk with what the Word has to say about our progress, we soon find that there may be a little wear-and-tear on the "old coin", but the "mint" marking makes all the difference!  We are "minted" by God!  We hold the greatest "value" because of that "mint" marking!

The "period" in which growth is produced in our lives is often a telling feature of the value of the path we have walked.  Those "teachable moments" when God's Word was allowed to be the guiding force in our lives produce very specific "value".  Just a important as the "minting" mark is the "period" in which a coin was produced.  The coins of the greatest value are often those that were produced in times that were a little rocky!  The same is true in our spiritual growth - the rocky times produce some of the greatest rewards!

As you consider this passage today, ask God what "standards" you have been using to compare the similarities and differences in your life.  If it has not been the reliable measure of his Word - it may be time to consider a different "source" of measurement!

You Got What?

^1-5 No doubt about it! God is good— good to good people, good to the good-hearted.  But I nearly missed it, missed seeing his goodness.  I was looking the other way, looking up to the people at the top, envying the wicked who have it made, who have nothing to worry about, not a care in the whole wide world. 

(Psalm 73:1-5)

Have you ever found yourself in the place of envying those at the top?  We have a tendency to "elevate" some to levels of prominence in our society.  If they are educated and well-spoken, we find ourselves wondering why we cannot say things so eloquently.  If they are financially successful, we wonder how they got all the breaks.  If they are in a tremendous relationship with another individual, we find ourselves bemoaning that we are not.  Guess what?  Envy is more common than we might think!

David is being pretty honest with us here in this passage.  He reminds us that God is good and good to the good-hearted.  But...David nearly missed that fact because he was so busy comparing himself with those that "seemed" to be doing so well according to the standards of the day.  We can do exactly the same thing whenever we get so caught up in comparing where we are financially, what struggles we have with sin in our lives compared to that of another, etc.  It is a dangerous place to be!

Envy should be understood as a four-letter word!  We see the advantages of another, their success and their possessions, and them compare that to what we have.  The end result is that we find ourselves "complaining" about what we DON'T have instead of blessing God for what we DO have!  The problem with envy is that it often leads to bitterness.  That is why we are warned so frequently in scripture to avoid comparison!  It carries the ability to place us in bondage to bitterness!

There are degrees to our envy, according to some.  Some think that a little jealousy over someone else getting the advantage that we see that we should have had in a situation is not really all that bad.  Others think that envy is really when we get all worked up about the other getting that advantage.  Guess what?  Both are envy and both are going to cause us to miss out on what God has for US!!!

When we are so caught up in what another accomplishes, or the advantages they enjoy, we miss out on what God has immediately in front of us!  The emotional investment we make in "begrudging" another of their success is really not worth it!  It robs us of the energy it takes to embrace what God has "gifted" into our lives.  God has spiritual growth in store for each of us - when we compare our growth with that of another, we sometimes get envious of what another seems to be able to accomplish!  

The truth is that growth occurs incrementally - it just may be more "evident" at certain stages of our lives.  Think about it from the physical perspective.  We don't "see" our hormones kicking in during puberty, but after many months, along come the "signs" of puberty!  Voices change, bodily features begin to develop, giving us "signs" of growth.  Yet, all along, that growth was taking place!  When we are only looking at the external signs, we can be fooled that nothing is taking place right below the surface!

I guess that is why our psalmist wanted to confess that he almost missed it!  He got his eyes off of what God was doing, forgetting that what God is doing is not always evident right off the bat!  His movement in our lives is sometimes quite "stealth".  He is at work, but we just don't see it!  So, we drift into comparison, bemoaning that another seems to have the advantages that we so desperately long for.  I learned a long time ago that the growth another realizes is often "hidden" deep within!  It is unwise to consider myself as "not growing"!

God's at work, my friends!  Don't miss what he is doing!  It may be rather "masked" right now, but be confident and keep your eyes on him - not others!  He will reveal his work in its season!  Just remain faithful to him!

Sermon Lessons: Comparison

^1-5 "Don't pick on people, jump on their failures, criticize their faults— unless, of course, you want the same treatment. That critical spirit has a way of boomeranging. It's easy to see a smudge on your neighbor's face and be oblivious to the ugly sneer on your own. Do you have the nerve to say, 'Let me wash your face for you,' when your own face is distorted by contempt? It's this whole traveling road-show mentality all over again, playing a holier-than-thou part instead of just living your part. Wipe that ugly sneer off your own face, and you might be fit to offer a washcloth to your neighbor."

(Matthew 7:1-5)

I am probably not the only one that felt a little "picked on" in elementary school.  In fact, there are actual laws on the books today to deal with what you and I just simply had to muddle through - they are called "anti-bullying laws".  The instruction we received from our parents and school counselors was that the tendency to "bully" or "pick on" another individual was really a clear sign that the "bully" was pointing out the faults of others because they did not want to have others know their faults! 

Now, we are in the workplace and faced with a whole new dynamic of "bullying" that we must deal with - it is sometimes called "office dynamics".  The "gurus" that analyze the "office dynamics" tell us that we need to first increase our own self-awareness so that we can successfully begin to interact with others through an awareness of the other person.  In short, and without a whole lot of hype, what we really need to do is take ownership for our own actions and stop comparing ourselves to the other guy!

Comparison is not a bad thing - if the focus is on how much we have in common.  It is when we begin to meddle with the things that are different in a manner that is rude, judgmental, or hurtful that we begin to break down the relationship.  Comparing ourselves to another individual is a "flawed" concept, simply because the other individual has their own set of strengths and weaknesses.  We have ours.  No one individual is "completely" strong or weak.  In fact, that is why we find ourselves attracted to another individual sometimes - their strengths offset our weaknesses.

Our passage today reminds us of the dangers of comparison - we have a tendency to elevate what we see as our strengths and diminish what we actually are displaying as our weaknesses.  It took a long time for me to realize that pointing out the weaknesses of another did NOT take the heat off of me when I displayed those same weaknesses.  In fact, it MAGNIFIED them.  That is why Jesus tells his disciples that they must first remove the LOG from their own eye before they take aim at the speck in the other person's eye!

The more we try to "down-play" our weaknesses by pointing out those of another, the more we play the part of the "bully".  It took me a long time to get comfortable enough with myself to be truly honest about my "junk".  The "junk" of my past, those things that make me who I am, is nothing I can down-play or hide.  In fact, it lends to my character!  As time has gone by, I see that God has been at work on the things I tried so hard to down-play.  In turn, as I was open to the fact that the "junk" existed in me, I was allowing him to use others who had struggled with similar "junk" to help me overcome my "junk". 

So, today is a new day for us all.  We have the opportunity to stop down-playing our weaknesses by pointing them out in others.  We have the chance to be totally free of the need to compare, criticize, and create tension.  The first step is to admit that what we are really pointing out is that LOG in our own eye! 

Lifestyles of the Rich & Famous

 ^1-5 No doubt about it! God is good— good to good people, good to the good-hearted.  But I nearly missed it, missed seeing his goodness.  I was looking the other way, looking up to the people at the top, envying the wicked who have it made, who have nothing to worry about, not a care in the whole wide world. 

(Psalm 73:1-5)

It is easy for us to envy the rich, the famous, the successful in society.  We see just one side of their lives, though - that which is public and which "appears" to be glamorous.  There used to be a show on called "The Lifestyles of the Rich and the Famous".  When that show hit the screen in 1984, it was all that people could flock to see.  Robin Leach would end each show with his raising of a glass of champaign and his signature salutation, "Champaign Wishes & Caviar Dreams".  

That show was one of our first glimpses at "reality television" in an era that would rapidly evolve into the "reality television" of today.  It began as a simple look into the opulent lifestyles of famous people - movie stars, sports heroes, and people who had amassed their wealth through shrewd business dealings.  People who seemed to have it all together - an flaunted what they had.  Did you know that his show ran for eleven years on syndicated TV?  It took us eleven years to figure out that what we envied no longer satisfied our yearnings!

We did not stop there - we saw the creation of "later and greater" versions of reality television.  Survivor and Big Brother pitted one group of individuals against another, conniving and cheating to get the coveted place of honor in the group that week.  Fear Factor challenged its participants to do some things that they would NEVER have done if they were not enticed by some huge financial reward.  Wife Swap became the perfect opportunity to "experiment" with changing places and roles - and became the perfect venue for poking fun at the way individuals live, their values, and their dreams.

Today, we look at where we are in comparison to where another is in life, evaluating our "successes" against the other person's.  Either we come out on top, or we fall below what we see in their achievements.  Either way, we lose! Comparing ourselves to others is a dangerous place to be.  We NEVER come out on top!  We will definitely miss seeing God's goodness in our midst if we are only focused on the world's view of success (wealth, fame, or status).  

God's goodness to us is manifest in his pursuing love.  It is evident in his unyielding grace.  It is discovered in his tender mercies.  We miss that when we set out to envy those who seem to be "all together".  If we can learn anything from "reality television" it is this - things are not always what they appear to be.  Yet, with God, what we behold in him, we receive - we have access to far greater things in him than we could ever "attain" or "achieve to" in this world.

Perhaps we should focus on the best form of "reality" - The Lifestyles of the God-Blessed and God-Held.  Probably would not attract the masses and make national syndication, but it definitely would be "worth" watching!