The God of Compassion

For even if the mountains walk away and the hills fall to pieces, my love won’t walk away from you, my covenant commitment of peace won’t fall apart. The God who has compassion on you says so. (Isaiah 54:10)

I actually heard this passage today on my walk. No, God didn't shout it down from the skies above - it was part of a devotional I was listening to online. My love won't walk away from you - take notice of those words because they speak volumes in uncertain times. God's love, intense and grace-filled, will not walk AWAY from you. In fact, his love walks TOWARD you even when you are walking away from him!

We serve a God of compassion - for compassion is the basis of grace. We get what we do not deserve - not because we earned it, but because his compassion makes a way for us to receive it. The way? Christ Jesus. The amount of his compassion that would make such a way? The life of his Son, Jesus. To whom is this compassion given? You and me.

God's covenant commitment to his children remains solid even when everything else around us seems to be 'hitting the fan'. We observe gas prices soaring higher and higher. Grocery budgets are blown with the higher price of food items at the store. Natural disaster after disaster leaves devastation and insurmountable clean up in their paths. How can we still have solid footing when all else seems to be crumbling around us?

Remember his compassion - it reaches into the darkest of places on brings the boldest of lights. It softens the hardest of hearts and opens the minds of those who say he cannot be real. It indulges the dreams of the young and imparts the wisdom of the aged. It creates where only dust and ashes remain. It answers when spoken to and calls out when we fail to listen. His compassion will never fail us. It will never leave us. Trust his love to be your strength, even when all else seems to be against you at the moment. He won't abandon ANY of his children in their time of distress. Just sayin!

Inside my skin

"Compassion is sometimes the fatal capacity for feeling what it is like to live inside somebody else's skin. It is the knowledge that there can never really be any peace and joy for me until there is peace and joy finally for you too." (Frederick Buechner) 

Whose 'skin' have you been living in this week? I know a good many individuals who never 'get out of' their own skin long enough to realize what it is like living in someone else's skin. Their days are filled with 'me', 'me', 'me' - leaving little room for any other concern a brother or sister may be enduring. It is a truly sad existence to never get out of one's skin! Compassion isn't given any other way. The genuineness of one's caring is really not 'felt' by the other person until the 'compassion connection' is really made.

It’s criminal to ignore a neighbor in need, but compassion for the poor—what a blessing! (Proverbs 14:21)

The other person is overtaken by something that causes great pain for them. They may or may not reveal their pain openly, but know this - it is painful nonetheless. Be the kind of friend that recognizes their 'hidden pain' even when they are not yet comfortable admitting it exists. There is sorrow inside that other person's skin - you will discover it when you crawl inside their world for just a while. There is no joy felt deeper than when it is the joy that comes from sharing the burden with another who is hurting, fearful, or lost in their pain.

What is your neighbor's need? Sometimes we think we have to know someone so well in order to understand or acknowledge their need. Trust me on this - you can learn a lot about a person by walking a while in their skin! You may not know them well when you start the journey, but you will get insight into their life very quickly when you take that first step. It doesn't take much to lift the spirits of the one alone in their pain, sorrow, or fear. It takes you caring enough to do more than say you care! 

I don't know what it is like to lose a leg, but a good friend of mine has experienced it first-hand. Her struggles are real. Her pain is more than 'adjusting' to life without that limb. I haven't lost a child, but I have friends who have. Their pain is not just for the loss, but there is sometimes a sense of guilt for having 'outlived' them. I may not know that loss, or those feelings of pain, but I am able to understand they don't need to walk alone. I don't need to tell them their loved one is in a 'better place' - that isn't what they need to hear. They just need me to 'get inside their skin' a while and walk with them through that grief. If we want to be Jesus to the world, it starts by being Jesus to each other. Just sayin!

Compassion or Condemnation?

"Compassion will cure more sins than condemnation." (Henry Ward Beecher) Most of us need more doses of compassion and far less doses of condemnation! One of the things I used to tell my kids is that the world would find ample opportunity to poke fun at them, finding fault with what they did or what they wore, but within the walls of the home in which they lived, we wanted to do less fault finding and far more accepting. Why? Simply because I knew the 'condemnation' moments would outweigh the 'compassion' moments in this lifetime.

Jehovah is kind and merciful, slow to get angry, full of love. He is good to everyone, and his compassion is intertwined with everything he does. (Psalm 145:8-9 TLB)

Compassion is a "God-word". It involves that deep-seated desire to alleviate the suffering and pain of others, even if it costs you everything. Seldom are we truly encountered by such a great desire here on this earth in those we associate with. God isn't moved by sympathy, but by compassion. He sees great need before him, often knowing others heap piles and piles of condemnation upon us in measures disproportionate to what is deserved. He also knows our tendency to heap even more condemnation upon that pile ourselves!

In this lifetime, those 'condemnation moments' come more regularly than we'd like, but remember this...God's 'compassion moments' are innumerable and are always available to us. To the harshness of this world God speaks kindness to us. To the indifference of those who turn a deaf ear and blind eye to sin around them, God speaks attentive tenderness and consideration. He isn't immune to our cries for mercy anymore than he is blind to our constant hurt because of all the condemnation coming our way daily. 

Before we condemn one another, let us remember that there but for the grace of God we walk ourselves. It is because of his grace we live above condemnation - in compassionate fellowship with him daily. It is because of his kindness toward us that we know the peace of God in the midst of turmoil that would otherwise destroy us. Think about how much words cut, glances in our direction cause us doubt, or silence speaks more than words ever could. Now think about how much grace counters each of these. Which would you rather speak into someone's life today? Condemnation or compassion? I hope it is the latter. Just sayin!

Messing up, but not messed up

He does not punish us for all our sins; he does not deal harshly with us, as we deserve.  For his unfailing love toward those who fear him is as great as the height of the heavens above the earth.  He has removed our sins as far from us as the east is from the west.  The Lord is like a father to his children, tender and compassionate to those who fear him. For he knows how weak we are; he remembers we are only dust. (Psalm 103:10-14 NLT)

It is indeed good news to know that God doesn't deal with out sin in a harsh or unkind way! Some of us have a negative view of what our heavenly father is like because their earthly father wasn't all that great - others recount the wonderful kindness of their earthly fathers and have no problem relating to God as kind and just. The truth is that God doesn't abandon us, he sees us through, no matter how "misbehaved" we may be, and he isn't going to let us outrun his mercy! Think on that one just a moment - he doesn't let us outrun his love or his grace...he pursues us with a tenacity that suggests we not only matter to him, we matter more than anything else in this whole wide world!

We "deserve" many things - not all of them are exactly what we might imagine! I know my actions have sometimes been less than positive, producing some pretty gnarly results. Those times didn't end well in the natural sense - requiring a whole lot of emotional, spiritual, relational, and/or physical "mop up" in order to move beyond them. God's grace does something miraculous out of the mess I create, though. In fact, when I look closely at what he is doing, I see that he is helping me to rise again - not to repeat those mistakes or take those missteps again, but to rise above and overcome those wrong actions.  While I find it hard to be patient with all the "not so perfect" things I do in this lifetime, hoping against hope that the outcome could have been just a little better, God is already at work helping to change the course of what I messed up.

A couple of words of hope this morning we can focus on as we begin our day:

- God isn't out to get us. Some of us think "fathers" are all about punishment or discipline. God operates on a little different plane, though. He asks for obedience - but he doesn't force us into obedience. He is just when he holds us accountable for our misdeeds, but he also provides a way for us to move away from those missteps and toward the right ones - it is called grace and it is administered in love.

- God isn't after our hide, he is after our heart. He asks for us to put a little "skin in the game" because he knows where we make such an investment of ourselves, we are likely to appreciate and enjoy the outcome much more than if everything was just handed to us on a silver platter. Our heart is made strong by the things we have to work a little harder for, not because "we" did it, but because we took the steps toward seeing his outcome perfected in us.

- God knows we cannot walk this thing out alone. He isn't going to abandon us to our own devices, nor is he going to tell us to work it out ourselves. He does ask us to take the steps we know to be right - this is common sense. He does require us to be obedient to what he reveals to us. But...he doesn't just set us loose and expect us to find our own way. He is there, gently guiding us back on course when we veer ever so slightly.

God is just. He is loving. He is compassionate toward our needs - even when they are there in our lives because we "messed up". Just sayin!

Handicapped and loving it!

Handicap:  the disadvantage that makes success more difficult.  When I was in school, we had classrooms for "handicapped" kids.  We called them "special ed" classrooms back in the day.  I don't even know if they even still exist today.  Kids with both mental and physical "handicaps" spent their days in the classroom, learning the skills they'd need to make it in life.  It was my privilege to serve these kids in my high school.  Yep, my privilege.  I got to be a teacher's aide during their physical education class.  Right up my alley!  I loved the gym, the open field, and even the quiet of the water of the indoor pool.  It was made more perfect when I first saw one of these kids experience these wide open spaces for the first time!  You see, it was a new "concept" for my PE teacher, and she went out on a limb to show that these "handicapped" kids could be just as involved in the things life said they "couldn't" do as they could in the things life said they "could".  

My grace is enough; it’s all you need.  My strength comes into its own in your weakness.  Once I heard that, I was glad to let it happen. I quit focusing on the handicap and began appreciating the gift. It was a case of Christ’s strength moving in on my weakness. Now I take limitations in stride, and with good cheer, these limitations that cut me down to size—abuse, accidents, opposition, bad breaks. I just let Christ take over! And so the weaker I get, the stronger I become.  (2 Corinthians 12:9-10 MSG)

At first, lowering the basketball hoop to just about five feet off the ground seemed ludicrous.  But...when the first hoop was scored, the silliness of the action seemed lost in the glory and hoopla of the entire class of kids hooting and hollering over their peer's accomplishment!  I've thought back over some of the "adaptations" we made in the gym, the kickball field, and even the swimming pool, in order to give these kids a chance to experience the joys of team sports.  What I saw more frequently with this group of kids was the real meaning of "team".  The kids didn't strive to get a goal, or kick a home run, for themselves, but for the "team".  The celebration which ensued when they did was not for their own accomplishment as much as it was for the accomplishment of the team!

I wasn't very popular in high school.  A little bit of what you'd call a geek.  I loved science, toyed with sports, and dove into books like they'd go out of style someday!  Volunteering my free hour each day to be a teacher's aide to those others saw as "disadvantaged so as to make success an impossibility" had the effect of setting me even farther away from my peer group.  Yet, I would not change a thing!  What I experienced in the open arms and hearts of my "special" friends far exceeded anything I "lost" in the eyes of my peers!  

There were a lot of ups and downs with this group of kids.  Some days went better than others.  Sometimes I felt like we were "herding cats" - trying to always keep them in a group, attention on the game, and then helping them learn the new skill they'd need to kick the ball or sink the shot.  It wasn't until I saw the possibility in each person's life that I began to really "get into" the enjoyment of helping them explore their unique possibilities.  I think I was learning the lesson Paul is speaking of above - I quit focusing on the handicap of these kids and began appreciating the gift they were.  You see, focusing on the handicap only allowed me to see the impossibilities.  Focusing on their heart allowed me to see the tremendous possibilities of even the smallest accomplishments.

I think God is that way - he focuses on the possibilities, not the handicap in each of us!  He knows the "handicap" exists, but it might just be he sees it a whole lot less than he sees our possibilities!  As I have aged, I now have what some see as a physical handicap - the damage to my joints which arthritis has created, causing my movements to be less fluid than they used to be.  I don't run well anymore, have limited endurance for the long haul, and deal with pain daily.  I could focus on the "limits" of the "handicap" (the thing making it difficult for me to do some things), but if I did, I'd never get anywhere!  Paul hits the nail on the head:  Christ's strength "moves in on our weakness" not when we are strong and mighty, but when we are weak and needy.  

I don't know how many times we accept the label of "handicapped" in this life.  I think it might actually be more often than we would like to admit.  Going back to our definition, anytime we see any "disadvantage" we experience in life as that which we focus on as making success more difficult, or even impossible, we are accepting the label.  Scripture plainly says, "With God, all things are possible!"  Man focuses on the impossibility - God remains steadfast in declaring the possibility.  We ALL have some "handicap" in life.  Sometimes the best thing we can do with what we view as a "handicap" is to change our perspective on how we see it.  If we begin to see it as God's opportunity to reveal his strength in us, we might just see it less as a "handicap" and more of an "advantage".  

Those kids wore a "label" by some as "handicapped".  In my book, they were "loving", "forgiving", "compassionate", "kind", and "honest".  You see, their "limitations" in life did not make them less able to experience and show love. In fact, I think they "loved well".  They learned not only to forgive others, but they were constantly called upon to forgive themselves because each "failure" presented a new opportunity to "begin again".  Their ability to associate with the others who also failed, got back up, and tried again only revealed the tremendous amount of "compassion" they had for those who fail.  There response to each other was kind - forbearing the little annoyances of life.  Most of the time, their words were quite truthful - almost too honest, if that were possible!  In those "honest" moments, I often saw my own "dishonesty".  I "masked" my failures - they had no choice but to be wide open with theirs.  Maybe there is a lesson there, too.  In our honesty of transparency, when we are really "real" with others, we experience the opportunity to "overcome" our "handicap".  

What makes us weak on this earth has a way of connecting us with the strength of heaven!  Just sayin!

Second Fiddle and Loving It!

Do you dislike "playing second fiddle" to anyone?  You know - being subordinate to anyone or anything.  If some of us were really honest right now, we'd admit we don't like "playing second fiddle" to anyone or anything!  We like being in charge and we don't want to depend on anyone else.  There is something to be learned in dependence which never will be learned as long as we declare and hold fast to our independence though.  Maybe this lesson is just too hard to learn, so we resist it so dearly.  A friend and I were talking the other day about whether either of us would see ourselves remarried again in the future.  It came down to a talk about liking our "independence" vs. "being dependent" on someone else.  Bottom line, I ended the conversation with, "Independence is not always what it is cracked up to be!"

Love from the center of who you are; don’t fake it. Run for dear life from evil; hold on for dear life to good. Be good friends who love deeply; practice playing second fiddle.  (Romans 12:9-10 MSG)

For those who don't know me, you should know I have been "single again" for longer than I was "single" in the first place!  I married at 20 and have been "single again" for nearly 25 years.  In that time, I raised two kids, have enjoyed being involved in the lives of my two grandsons, and most recently been in the position of caring for an aging parent.  In each of these relationship "journeys" I have learned some pretty valuable lessons about "playing second fiddle" - something which does not come easily to most of us in relationships.

In my marriage, one of the toughest things to do was to "play second fiddle". To lay one's desires down for another's is often a very difficult thing to do.  Let me just say this is most certainly not being "under the thumb" of a controlling husband, or living as a "doormat" in a relationship.  If you have ever played a team sport such as softball, football, or soccer, you know there are individuals on the team who do a much better job of setting the ball up, fielding the balls hit into the deep outfield, and scoring the goals.  The one who sets the ball up for the goal to be scored is equally as important at the kicker who puts it into the goal!  One without the other is really not a team, but an "independent contractor".  I don't think God intended for "independent contractors" in relationships.  In looking back over my ten years of marriage, I think he intended for us to recognize the strengths of the other in the relationship and to compliment each other with those strengths.

In raising children some mothers will tell you they feel like those wee ones just "suck the life" from them.  It is like they are "leaching" the life right out of you some days - clinging on you, demanding more and more, until you are about worn down to nothing.  Their needs often outweigh our own, don't they?  We don't want to awaken at 2 a.m. to a crying infant, pleading to be held, freshly diapered, and beckoning for their tummy to be filled to capacity.  In fact, to be honest, we want to roll over, pull the pillow over our heads, snuggle down into the warm covers and hope the noise just goes away!  What I learned from motherhood may not be much of a lesson to you, but it was to me.  I learned what it really means to be dependent on another - for those wees one had a way of "taking from me" exactly what they needed most.  Maybe this is the lesson of parenthood - learning to give what another needs, regardless of how much our emotions cry out for us to just think about ourselves.  

Grandchildren are indeed a gift from God.  You can love them, spoil them silly, and then send them home!  Yet, there is something which has come into my life with grandchildren - the ability to mentor and model.  You see, my children now come to me for advice - something they never considered all that worthwhile when they were teenagers!  In those moments, I see what it means to be "dependent" on another - looking for answers about how to make ends meet, hoping for some cure to make the kids eat their vegetables, or simply finding ways to make time for the other in a hectic life filled with work and chores.  Maybe God allows parents to again be "smart" in the eyes of their children because he knows they need role models who show them how to live out this faith in their day-to-day life.

Probably most revealing to me is the role of an aging parent debilitated by the years and with failing faculties - totally dependent on another for their safety, every provision of life, and even for their socialization.  They never wanted to be where they find themselves now, but it is a reality of life which they cannot escape.  They never envisioned themselves moving from independence into dependence.  Maybe God's lesson in this is the beauty of giving back what has been given out for so many years - their faithful love matched with our faithful care.

Dependence vs. independence - the lesson of the "second fiddle".  The best music is made when we recognize the times for "first fiddle" to begin to "play second fiddle".  Just sayin!

Sermon Lessons: Comfort

⁴"You're blessed when you feel you've lost what is most dear to you. Only then can you be embraced by the One most dear to you."

(Matthew 5:4)

^9-11When down-and-outers get a break, cheer! And when the arrogant rich are brought down to size, cheer! Prosperity is as short-lived as a wildflower, so don't ever count on it. You know that as soon as the sun rises, pouring down its scorching heat, the flower withers. Its petals wilt and, before you know it, that beautiful face is a barren stem. Well, that's a picture of the "prosperous life." At the very moment everyone is looking on in admiration, it fades away to nothing.

(James 1:9-11)

Yesterday we explored the importance of establishing the loss of "control" in our lives as the means of actually giving control to the one who is able to manage our lives the best - God.  Today, we will look at what "losing what is dear to us" really does in our lives.  It is in loss that we understand the need for comfort.  It is also in loss that we connect with that which is most important to us.  There is just something about loss - physical, emotional, or relational - that causes us to look at our lives again.  We become "evaluators" of where we have been, what we have done, and the cost that we have paid for where we find ourselves today.

Things are short-lived.  We tend to count on them sometimes as though they are permanent.  We expect our cars to run when we hit the ignition switch.  We don't count on them sputtering to a halt in the middle of an intersection.  When we take them to the mechanic and hear the news that the cost of repairs outweighs the remaining value of the vehicle, we find ourselves faced with tough decisions.  James' advice to us is to realize that things are really not permanent.  They change with time.  

We are often put in positions where our careers take a turn we did not expect, the economy sends us into a tizzy because ends no longer meet, or the people we thought would be there for us in times of hardship are just not sensitive to the moment.  These are opportunities for God to embrace us like he has not been allowed to before.  Our "counting on" people, things, or circumstances has kept him at arms length.  In the time of loss, he can finally pull us close.  Our defenses are let down, and he can reach into our hearts in comfort, in correction if needed, and in his healing compassion.

When God embraces us, he is taking us near to his heart eagerly - there is an intense willingness to pull us near.  He takes that which is ready to be received.  He does not force himself on us.  Comfort is only accepted by a ready heart.  Correction is only useful if the ears and mind are open to listening to it.  Compassion only connects with our misery and walks with us in the moments that cause us distress when we are open to having a "walking companion".

We may not fully recognize the "frailty" of those things, plans, and people who have been given a position of "trust" in our lives.  Yet, in the loss of these, God stands ready to reveal his love - and yes, if necessary, his correction.  The two are not opposites - they go hand in hand.  It is in love that correction brings us close.  It is in love that comfort accomplishes healing.  It is in love that we understand the strength of his embrace.  Have you experienced the comfort of his embrace lately?  

An Approved Life

^8-12Summing up: Be agreeable, be sympathetic, be loving, be compassionate, be humble. That goes for all of you, no exceptions. No retaliation. No sharp-tongued sarcasm. Instead, bless—that's your job, to bless. You'll be a blessing and also get a blessing. Whoever wants to embrace life and see the day fill up with good, here's what you do: say nothing evil or hurtful; snub evil and cultivate good; run after peace for all you're worth. God looks on all this with approval, listening and responding well to what he's asked; but he turns his back on those who do evil things.

(I Peter 3:8-12)

We are given a "list" of character traits that we are to exhibit as the children of God.  As we examine them today, we will find that living in such a manner actually encourages God's blessing in our lives.  He is opening us up to living in such a manner, bringing delight to his heart, and in turn, delighting us with the blessing of his presence, constant care, and protection in our lives.

Be agreeable - ouch!  That one tops the list for a reason.  When we live in a manner that is compatible with the character of Christ, we are agreeable.  We are accommodating of others, gracious, and harmonious in our responses.  Why is this so important?  Because it reflects the very grace of God to others.

Be sympathetic - affectionate, appreciative, considerate, and understanding of what the other person is going through.  If your main focus is to be agreeable, it will be easier to be considerate to others.  God wants us to learn to see life through the other person's eyes, instead of judging them from our vantage point in life.  This engages us with their needs and better focuses us on how to pray for them, helping them through their time of need.

Be loving and compassionate - this reflects a responsiveness on our part.  Loving and compassionate people are charitable in their response - kind, considerate.  

Be humble - courteously respectful of others in every way.  No need to pretend you are important - God honors the life that is real, genuine, and unassuming. A life that is humble is genuine - there is a transparency that does not assume we have it all together, but is willing to be opened up before others.

No retaliation - not returning like for like.  It is quite easy to strike out when we have been struck first.  It is quite another things to withhold angry response, returning evil with good.  This comes at about the middle of the list for a reason.  When we are learning to be reflective of the graciousness of a holy God, considerate of others, understanding of their vantage point in life, it is easier to be willing to NOT retaliate when they strike out.  These build upon each other - there is first a change of heart that begins to affect how we interpret life (how we think), followed by a change of action (how we respond).

No sharp-tongued sarcasm - sarcasm is caustic.  It destroys the self-worth of another.  It is usually directed from a heart that has little understanding of being charitable (kind and considerate), struggling with pride (wanting to cover up our own faults by pointing out another's), etc.  God wants his kids to be known for their gentle answer, truthfulness, and their compassionate embracing of the sinner.

The promise to us is that God looks well on those that are working to allow these traits to become part of who we are - he opens the doors of blessing in our lives.  He turns a hearing ear to the heart that wants to live in such a manner - it honors him.  These are tougher than we imagine - yet, with the help of God's Spirit resident within us, they are entirely possible character qualities that we can have worked into the fiber of our being.  Today is a new day.  Give it to God and see what he will do with it!