Not going to 'fit in'

"Belonging" is something kids start to 'pursue' at a very early age. They want to belong to a neighborhood group of friends or a best friend. The wish to belong to a group of kids at school with similar interests and who actually help them stay 'insulated' against those who would seek to do them harm by bullying or targeting them for some 'flaw' they have in their size, shape, or ability. In school I found there were various groups of people - some were pretty popular, others not so much. In the moment, almost all of us wanted to be part of the popular group. It was not so much the desire to "do" what they did, but to be considered to be "part of" their group. In fact, if I had considered some of the stuff they "did", I might have reconsidered my all-fired desire to "fit into" their group! Isn't it funny how we view others from the limited perspective of how being "part" of their "circle" will benefit us? This is certainly not a new issue in society - nor is it soon to be resolved! Many a 'good thing' turns 'bad' for us when we focus more on 'belonging' than in the choices we make by belonging to the wrong crowd or thing!

Mordecai walked out of the king's presence wearing a royal robe of violet and white, a huge gold crown, and a purple cape of fine linen. The city of Susa exploded with joy. For Jews it was all sunshine and laughter: they celebrated, they were honored. It was that way all over the country, in every province, every city when the king's bulletin was posted: the Jews took to the streets in celebration, cheering, and feasting. Not only that, but many non-Jews became Jews—now it was dangerous not to be a Jew! (Esther 8:15-17)

In looking back, I have discovered we often believe it is more "dangerous" for us to be outside of the "group" than it is to be on the "inside track" with them. As I consider some of the things I engaged in just to "fit in", my hair kind of prickles at the nape of my neck! The type of speech I used, the ways I tried to dress, the out and out rebellious deeds I engaged in - they just mount up and make me shake my head at how dumb I actually was to have made those choices. Isn't it amazing how many times we consider it a "benefit" to be anywhere other than where we are, be doing something other than what we are doing, or to be someone other than we truly are? If we re-read this passage closely, we see an amazing thing happening here. Mordecai was actually exalted to a place of honor and 'status' in the kingdom because he refused to compromise his values - he refused to 'fit in' just because others told him there were certain things he had to do in order to 'fit' the present day trends. 

He stood strong when asked to bow to the government official in homage - instead choosing to believe no one other than God himself was due this type of honor. Our values are the one thing no one can truly take away from us. When they are rightly rooted in the Word of God, the promises and commands contained within, we find these to be both a comfort and a strong foundation for our lives. In looking back over my life, I discovered how much every "compromise" of a value actually cost me. Values are a guiding principle - compromise them and you soon realize how much compromise costs - if not in monetary terms, at least in the toll it takes on your emotions, spiritual health, and maybe even your physical well-being. Hold fast to them, and you will be rewarded - maybe not in the moment, but God never forgets his children! When even one person stands upon the values they know to be right and sure, an entire nation can be affected by that 'stand'! We will never fully realize the impact of our "deciding moments" - not only in our own lives, but in the lives of those who observe them. What we choose to do with the decisions of today determines the course of tomorrow - for us, and for those we influence.

We never know the significance of the impact of our remaining true to our values. Even those with dissimilar values can be impacted. For Mordecai, the very fact he held to his beliefs and was honored for this stand began to cause those outside of the faith to consider what the "benefits" of his faith really could be - so much so that they were 'converting' to his faith. Wouldn't it be great if our deciding moments of today began to influence others to "investigate" the hope we have found in Christ? I wonder if the day will come when those who don't believe in Christ will ever feel it is a "dangerous thing" to NOT believe in him? Who knows what impact we could make if we lived true to our convictions - refusing to compromise, standing upon what we believe to be true, and delighting in doing the will of God! Just sayin!

I don't fit in

Thanksgiving, Christmas, Easter - all are celebratory times in the Christian faith. In a world as diverse as ours, we see all kinds of "customs" and "ways" of doing or celebrating things or seasons that are somewhat different from those we may have been raised to observe ourselves. The passage of time even affects the customs and ways of various people's celebrations. Just look at the tendency to all eat dinner as a family in the 50's being replaced with the "catch as catch can" type of family gatherings we see today. Or consider the 'old way' of setting up a room so it was good for conversation vs. today's custom of setting it up so it is good for TV viewing or playing games on the game system! Yet, when a people holds to a custom, there are always going to be others who will find some fault with it.

Haman then spoke with King Xerxes: "There is an odd set of people scattered through the provinces of your kingdom who don't fit in. Their customs and ways are different from those of everybody else." (Esther 3:8)

When we are 'different' than others, we stand out as 'odd' to some. Haman was not as concerned about Mordecai (the cousin of Esther) being a Jew as much as he was concerned about Mordecai refusing to bow down to him in some sign of awareness of his "masterful" position he had obtained in the government. Haman had been promoted to the "top dog" position in the local government - the highest official of the land next to the king himself. In keeping with this "regal" position, he desired the pomp and circumstance which went with it! Bowing as he passed was just one of those "customs" he desired to see from those who were considered to be his 'subjects' in the land.

Mordecai was a Jew faithful to his upbringing - and that included his customs and his allegiance to only bow down to one thing - the God he served. He knew the teaching of the Law of Moses - you shall have no other gods before me. In other words, he would not bow before any other - only God himself - not another human, no matter what their 'rank' was in society. It was not a thing of disrespecting Haman, but a matter of honoring God. As a result, Haman labeled him, and his fellow Jews, as "not fitting in". I guess King Xerxes had never really observed the customs of the Jews as much of an affront to himself, but he liked Haman, so he went along with the plans of the "little weasel". It is truly a sad day when the leadership of the land cannot, or will not take time to investigate the circumstance presented to them before allowing the passage of a rule which impacts so many! The vote of the "popular" may not always be to the advantage of the rest of society!

The message which spoke to me today in the study of this passage really centered on being a people who just "don't fit in". Mordecai was not content to "blend in" with all the others in society. He had an "identity" in his heritage which he held as his current manner of behavior. In fact, Mordecai was never disloyal to the king or the authorities of the land. He had even uncovered a plot to harm the king - being sure to get word of the plot to the king through Esther so it could be thwarted before it had a chance to work out. In short order, the king dealt with the rebels who plotted against him, recording the actions of Mordecai's "good deed" in the annals of the king. So, on the day when Haman came to complain about Mordecai, why didn't the king remember him? I imagine the king had many loyal "citizens" of the land and a great deal on his mind as a ruler. Haman never presented Mordecai as the "ring-leader" or as the instigator of this attack on the Jews. In fact, I think he cleverly worked it out to purposefully NOT tell the king about Mordecai being a Jew, or an observer of the 'odd customs'. It was his intolerance of the Jewish customs and ways which motivated him.

We are often faced with customs and ways which we may not fully understand or appreciate. I am not saying we need to be tolerant of those that hurt others or lead others into bondage of soul, but we do need to be aware of the heart behind the actions. I personally don't wear dresses to church - but I have attended churches where this was the custom (and I honored their custom). Two lessons for us today. First, look at the heart behind the custom. When we focus only on what we see and not what is being "lived out", we often miss the purpose of the custom. Second, leaders do their best when they pause long enough to consider each action in light of all of those they represent. When decisions are made in haste, based on one man or woman's input, without adequate investigation and preparation, we often miss the unintended harm which comes in our moment of inattentive action. Just sayin!

Let him free

Many people live by some unwritten code that implies rules are for breaking, not for keeping - do you know any of them? There is just some inward "pull" to break a few rules once in a while, or perhaps all of the time. While I am not a 'rule-breaker' all of the time, I definitely do my share of pushing the limits of the rules and/or breaking them all of the time. Yesterday we began to look at the sensibility of "following the rules" God sets out for us. His first "rule" was very clearly stated: No other god but me. His second is almost along the same line, but with a little different "twist":

“You must not make for yourself an idol of any kind or an image of anything in the heavens or on the earth or in the sea." (Exodus 20:4)

No other god but me focused on any affection or attention we directed toward another person or pursuit which clearly took our affection and attention off God himself. Today's "rule" deals with trying to pigeon-hole God into a box which fits our "image" of what he should be like, behave like, or 'become' in our opinion of how he should function. God warned the nation of Israel through Moses against creating some "graven image" - carved sculpture or the like - which we'd be inclined to look upon and form some attachment with. Why? Simply put - God does not "fit" man's limited (finite) image of who he is! He is all things to all people, all knowing, all places at all times, unlimited in power, and totally holy. Try "fitting" these characteristics into some "image" and you will find yourself frustrated by the limitations of your own mind to actually accomplish a credible image of him.

In a deeper sense, God really does not want us to "limit" him by what we envision him to be like. God's abilities are beyond our "reasoning" or "thinking" powers. His love is beyond our ability to comprehend the unfathomable depths of his grace. His desires toward us are outside of our limited emotionally-based affections. In other words, when we try to "understand" God by having him "fit" a particular image, we limit him in our lives. God knows the dangers of limiting him - so he directs us to avoid the creation of any image which pigeon-holes him into some limited impression of who he is or how he acts.

In times past, pigeons were kept in these little cabinets, stored away until they would be served up as delicacies. The purpose of keeping them in the "hole" was to fatten them up for the meal at hand. As cabinet making became an art, pigeon-holes were built into cabinetry and furnishings in order to neatly store away items. As we use the term today, we simply refer to the process of "putting away" something for a later use, or classifying it according to some function. I think this is what God may have in mind when he asks us not to "pigeon-hole" him! He is not some "delicacy" just to be fattened up and enjoyed only on certain occasions! He is not stored away until there is some later need for him. In fact, whenever we try to "classify" him in any particular manner, we are setting "boundaries" in our minds which only serve to create a limited perspective of his authority, power, and purpose in our lives.

Most of us probably understand that "graven images" of God are not something which honor God. Yet, I wonder if we really understand the "images" of God we have set up in our own minds? I believe we may have more "limiting images" of God than we first imagine. We might do very well to see just where we have been "pigeon-holing" God in our minds - limiting him in some way because we hold him up to the "candle" of some merely human characteristic or attribute - we try to make him fit into what we see or feel. God is not limited - we'd do well to let him live "unlimited" in our lives! Just sayin!

A perfect fit

You can build a house, or you can build a home. There is a vast difference, for one is just built and the builder moves on. The other is custom built for the one who intends to inhabit it. When a home is created, the one creating it is intent on bringing together all the right materials for what he envisions. The home will have all the 'finishing touches' of the creator. It is a joyful thing to finally come to a place where we feel like we "fit".  We often spend the majority of our lives looking for that "perfect fit" in life.  We experience disappointment when career, schooling, family, friends, spouse, etc., all somehow don't "fit" in quite the same way as we imagined.  The good news is that there is a "fit" in life that will never disappoint!

That's plain enough, isn't it? You're no longer wandering exiles. This kingdom of faith is now your home country. You're no longer strangers or outsiders. You belong here, with as much right to the name Christian as anyone. God is building a home. He's using us all—irrespective of how we got here—in what he is building. He used the apostles and prophets for the foundation. Now he's using you, fitting you in brick by brick, stone by stone, with Christ Jesus as the cornerstone that holds all the parts together. We see it taking shape day after day—a holy temple built by God, all of us built into it, a temple in which God is quite at home. (Ephesians 2:19-22)

When something "fits", we say it is adapted or suited for the purpose it is created for.  Our "fit" in life is that of relationship with the Lord Jesus Christ.  We are created for the very purpose of bringing him glory and honor.  When we pursue anything else as that "perfect fit", we find that it falls short - it just doesn't measure up as it should.  Something that is "fit" is also prepared or readied - such as a crop that is "fit" for gathering into the barns.  The only thing in life that makes us "fit" (prepared or readied) is Christ.  We need his transforming power in our lives in order to be prepared for what comes our way in the building process.

We often overlook the meaning of these verses - glancing over them with a quick acceptance that we are being built into a holy temple for God's presence to indwell.  This is only possible when Jesus is the builder (creator of the home). He is the one "fitting" the pieces of our lives together so that they are a perfect dwelling for that presence - each one being perfectly crafted so that as we are fit together, we all 'fit together'.  Together, we need his perfect forming, his spiritually powerful "architectural" abilities.  No group of individuals is "built together" without that power.  We can try as we might, but the differences we each possess are often a hindrance to such "building".  In his hands, those differences are uniquely placed side-by-side, forming exactly what brings him the honor he desires and the 'fitness' of the finished work suggests something of strength and solid structure. We aren't created to just be part of the house - we are created for his presence to declare that house a home.

Where do you fit?  Have you found your "fit" in life yet?  If not, Jesus stands at the ready to begin the work of "fitting" each of us for the exact placement he has in mind for us.  Some of us have a "fit" that lends itself to being supports, while others have the unique fit of bringing beauty and pleasure to the structure he is creating.  Regardless of the "fit" we fulfill, when we finally find that "fit", we are in a place where we know perfect peace, overwhelming joy, and everlasting grace.  Ask God to show you what he is "fitting" you for today.  He delights in placing his hands on your life, forming you into his planned purpose for your life, and creating a place for his presence to dwell for all of eternity. Just sayin!

Invitation to be perfectly fit

^19-22That's plain enough, isn't it? You're no longer wandering exiles. This kingdom of faith is now your home country. You're no longer strangers or outsiders. You belong here, with as much right to the name Christian as anyone. God is building a home. He's using us all—irrespective of how we got here—in what he is building. He used the apostles and prophets for the foundation. Now he's using you, fitting you in brick by brick, stone by stone, with Christ Jesus as the cornerstone that holds all the parts together. We see it taking shape day after day—a holy temple built by God, all of us built into it, a temple in which God is quite at home.

(Ephesians 2:19-22)

It is a joyful thing to finally come to a place where we feel like we "fit".  We often spend the majority of our lives looking for that "perfect fit" in life.  We experience disappointment when career, schooling, family, friends, spouse, etc., all somehow don't "fit" in quite the same way as we imagined.  Paul's words today point us toward the "fit" in life that will never disappoint!

When something "fits", we say it is adapted or suited for the purpose it is created for.  Our "fit" in life is that of relationship with the Lord Jesus Christ.  We are created for the very purpose of bringing him glory and honor.  When we pursue anything else as that "perfect fit", we find that it falls short.  Something that is "fit" is also prepared or readied - such as a crop that is "fit" for gathering into the barns.  The only thing in life that makes us "fit" (prepared or readied) is Christ.  We need his transforming power in our lives in order to be prepared for what comes our way.

We often overlook the meaning of these verses - glancing over them with a quick acceptance that we are being built into a holy temple for God's presence to indwell.  This is only possible when Jesus is the builder - he is the one "fitting" the pieces of our lives together so that they are a perfect dwelling for that presence.  Together, we need his perfect forming, his spiritually powerful "architectural" abilities.  No group of individuals is "built together" without that power.  We can try as we might, but the differences we each possess is often a hindrance to such "building".  In his hands, those differences are uniquely placed side-by-side, forming exactly what brings him the honor he desires.

Where do you fit?  Have you found your "fit" yet?  If not, Jesus stands at the ready to begin the work of "fitting" us for the exact placement he has in mind for us.  Some of us have a "fit" that lends itself to being supports, while others have the unique fit of bringing beauty and pleasure to the structure he is creating.  Regardless of the "fit" we fulfill, when we finally find that "fit", we are in a place where we know perfect peace, overwhelming joy, and everlasting grace.  Ask God to show you what he is "fitting" you for today.  He delights in placing his hands on your life, forming you into his planned purpose for your life.