I have some friends who seemingly cry at the drop of a hat. You just say something, then almost imperceptibly, the tears begin to well up and there you are, them leaking tears and you standing there holding your hat in your hand! I've never been one of those individuals who "leaks" tears very often, but a good cry does something to cleanse our soul, doesn't it? The most precious tears are often shed right when I least expect them. For example, I can be driving down the road, listening to the Christian station, when a song comes on which "hits" me right where I am in life. The words do more than carry me along - they minister to my heart. In turn, I might just "leak" a little!
Crying is better than laughing. It blotches the face but it scours the heart. (Ecclesiastes 7:3 MSG)
Truth is, I like to laugh much better than I enjoy crying! Yet, there are some definite "types" of tears which I think say much more than any amount of laughter. These are the tears of grief, joy, comfort, and hope.
The tears of grief:
We experience grief because we have some sense of loss. It might be the loss of a loved one, but it could be the loss of reputation, relationship, or something more material such as a special bracelet someone made for us. I remember losing my dad when I was around thirty. He was a very special man in my life. I could always turn to him. He never judged. His heart was always open, no matter what my behavior. The night before he died, I went to see him after I got out of my nursing clinicals. I was tired after a long day on the nursing floor, but I knew I needed to be there. As I drove home that night, I recall vividly a song I have only heard another two or three times since then. In the words of the song, a small child came home to cars and people surrounding his home. The crux of the song: Grandpa has gone home! I knew this was God's way of telling me my heavenly Father was ushering my earthly father home. He left us at five the next morning. Yep, I "leaked" that night driving home. But...it was a "good leak" because I knew exactly where my dad was going and I knew my heavenly Father had each of us who were left behind in his tender care. We all experience grief - there is something quite "cleansing" about the shedding of the tears which come from a broken heart. I think those tears are all captured in God's hand, then carefully transferred to little bottles. Each bottle bears our name. As God looks at each of the bottles, he sees some fuller than others, but each tear has such meaning - not one of them escaped his notice. Not one of them is ever forgotten by him.
The tears of joy:
Have you ever been so in awe of something someone did for you, so overwhelmed by the moment, you just "leak" tears of joy? You know the ones I mean - the moment just ministers to your heart. Those moments when more is spoken in one deed or one carefully chosen word than could ever be demonstrated in a thousand deeds or words. I have been blessed with some pretty special friends in life. Each season of my life has brought at least one specific friend who walks closely with me through that season. In my young adult years, I had the closeness of a friend who encouraged my spiritual growth, challenged me to go to Bible College, and then even took care of my children so I could! She changed their diapers, fed them lunch, and even helped me get them potty-trained - all while I was getting my education. As I walked down the aisle to receive my diploma that night in 1984, I knew I was receiving this diploma for two people - because she made it possible by her sacrifice! Yep, I "leaked" tears of joy as we embraced, she told me how proud she was of me, and I just held onto her knowing how awesome it was to have such a friend. You see, we left within the week, never to see each other again. Our "season" was ending. But...oh what a time of joy we had celebrated over the years! There is nothing quite as uplifting as having someone alongside in the journey. In those "moments" - tears of joy are only natural.
The tears of comfort:
Lately, I have noticed myself being very sensitive to various songs of worship we sing at church, or when they come on the radio. In the words, I find such comfort. They minister deeply to my spirit and in turn, they minister to my mind and body, as well. You see, God cannot touch our spirit and leave our mind or body unaffected. In touching our spirit, he is getting at the heart of what makes us unique - for it is in the spirit where we connect with God. The songs I am finding such comfort in right now? Those which speak of the nearness of God. I just am in a season of needing to experience his "nearness". You probably know what I mean - those times when words just fail, but the presence of God just speaks volumes. We all need these times of comfort for our soul - the best place of comfort is in the arms of Jesus. I don't know about you, but when he holds this sinner close, I leak a little!
The tears of hope:
We all get to the place we just don't see any way things are going to work out. We are at the end of our rope and we just see ourselves circling the drain, so to speak. Tenth Avenue North has a song called, "Any Other Way". The words which I'd like us to hear from this song are really found in the chorus: "It's not enough just to say we're okay. I need your hurt, I need your pain. It's not love any other way." The words are words of hope. The Lord is speaking them. He is saying, "YOU needed my hurts. YOU needed my pain. Frankly, it is NOT love any other way!" It gives me great hope knowing God doesn't skimp on the very thing we need to be free of our own hurts and pain!
Just some thoughts on tears this morning. Yep, I leaked a few just writing this, but that is okay. They are in my bottle - shelved carefully in his care. How about yours?
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Showing posts with label Grief. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Grief. Show all posts
Thursday, December 6, 2012
Friday, July 20, 2012
Crossing deserts?
I like salty treats - even to the point of craving them sometimes. Whenever I consume them though, I usually end up drinking a lot of water - because they make me thirsty. In the end, they leave me thirsty for a long time, not just while I am taking them in. My body simply cannot process all the sodium in the salty treats without a whole lot of water. In fact, whenever we find ourselves in the midst of the "excesses" of life, we often crave what we most need to help us deal with the excess.
God—you're my God! I can't get enough of you! I've worked up such hunger and thirst for God, traveling across dry and weary deserts. (Psalm 63:1 The Message)
So, we crave what we most need to deal with what we find ourselves enduring! Sometimes we are "enduring" stuff by our own doing - like when I eat a huge bowl of Cheezits or eat a whole candy bar. The sodium from one and the sugar from the other just cause me to "crave" the very thing which will help my body deal with the excess of sodium or sugar. Now, let's take a look at some of the things we find which develop a more "spiritual" craving.
Our psalmist gives us an example of traveling across dry and weary deserts as a source of both hunger and thirst. We all have them - deserts. We may live in the greenest parts of the world, but we endure deserts! Let's just look at a couple of deserts, shall we?
- The desert of loneliness. We may find ourselves suddenly without familiar acquaintances. Perhaps it is the result of a move to a new locale, the loss of a spouse, or the lack of solid friends we can pour our hearts out to. Regardless of the cause, we find ourselves enduring a sense of loneliness. At the core of loneliness is the idea of being without a companion in the journey. This desert is then a place of isolation - whether you wanted it or not. In the place of isolation, we often find ourselves without the people or things we have found ourselves relying on in the past. Now, as we examine the purpose of this desert, we might find it hard to imagine a "good" purpose! Being isolated is definitely NOT God's plan for us humans - he made us specifically to "relate" to others, not to be alone. So, what "good" comes out of this desert?
Well, I can only share some of the things which have come out of my times of being on a journey in this desert. First, I have learned I actually NEED other people. There is nothing more revealing about our "dependence" on the feedback of others, the sense of hope rendered in a simple touch, etc., than to be suddenly alone. We need connection. In fact, believe it or not, we crave it! Second, I believe God may actually allow some of us to walk this desert to draw us closer to those he has given in our lives. You know the saying, "Absence makes the heart grow fonder"? I think it is realized the most in the desert of loneliness! God's lessons to you may be a little different, but if you will allow him to speak to you in your desert, he will reveal the lessons!
- The desert of despair. This is a most difficult desert to face. It is one in which we have lost hope - we are without any sense of things ever getting better. In this desert, we often find ourselves out so far on the limb, the weight of our burden so great, hearing the cracking of the limb as it strains to keep us upright. We are "stuck" - we cannot go further out on the limb or turn back. This is indeed a most difficult desert to cross. Yet, the most hopeless place is often the place our faith begins to take flight!
In the desert of despair, we begin to look for solutions we often ignore when things are smooth sailing. Things like intimate prayer with our Maker - pouring out our hearts to him with eager desperation. In the moment of despair, don't we often find ourselves looking back to God? Did you catch that? We are looking "back" to God! It is an amazing thing, but despair often drives us back to God - maybe even without ever recognizing just how comfortable we had become without him!
- The desert of brokenness. The very thing we need in this desert is the very thing we have absolutely no ability to accomplish on our own. It is only by the restorative and regenerating touch of our God we cross this desert. We may be "broken" by a whole lot of things - bad relationships, words which have left us scarred, or just a series of bad choices which resulted in us being "undone" by life.
In the desert of brokenness, we need "repair", don't we? What we drink the most freely of in this desert is God's grace. It is indeed a refreshing and restorative "drink".
Regardless of the desert, look again at our passage. The purpose of the desert is to cause us to hunger and thirst. Hunger for the best, thirst for what will refresh truly. We may have a lot of desert-crossing in our days. Just remember this: No desert is without hunger or thirst of some kind. What we do with the hunger or thirst determines the outcome of the desert-crossing!
God—you're my God! I can't get enough of you! I've worked up such hunger and thirst for God, traveling across dry and weary deserts. (Psalm 63:1 The Message)
So, we crave what we most need to deal with what we find ourselves enduring! Sometimes we are "enduring" stuff by our own doing - like when I eat a huge bowl of Cheezits or eat a whole candy bar. The sodium from one and the sugar from the other just cause me to "crave" the very thing which will help my body deal with the excess of sodium or sugar. Now, let's take a look at some of the things we find which develop a more "spiritual" craving.
Our psalmist gives us an example of traveling across dry and weary deserts as a source of both hunger and thirst. We all have them - deserts. We may live in the greenest parts of the world, but we endure deserts! Let's just look at a couple of deserts, shall we?
- The desert of loneliness. We may find ourselves suddenly without familiar acquaintances. Perhaps it is the result of a move to a new locale, the loss of a spouse, or the lack of solid friends we can pour our hearts out to. Regardless of the cause, we find ourselves enduring a sense of loneliness. At the core of loneliness is the idea of being without a companion in the journey. This desert is then a place of isolation - whether you wanted it or not. In the place of isolation, we often find ourselves without the people or things we have found ourselves relying on in the past. Now, as we examine the purpose of this desert, we might find it hard to imagine a "good" purpose! Being isolated is definitely NOT God's plan for us humans - he made us specifically to "relate" to others, not to be alone. So, what "good" comes out of this desert?
Well, I can only share some of the things which have come out of my times of being on a journey in this desert. First, I have learned I actually NEED other people. There is nothing more revealing about our "dependence" on the feedback of others, the sense of hope rendered in a simple touch, etc., than to be suddenly alone. We need connection. In fact, believe it or not, we crave it! Second, I believe God may actually allow some of us to walk this desert to draw us closer to those he has given in our lives. You know the saying, "Absence makes the heart grow fonder"? I think it is realized the most in the desert of loneliness! God's lessons to you may be a little different, but if you will allow him to speak to you in your desert, he will reveal the lessons!
- The desert of despair. This is a most difficult desert to face. It is one in which we have lost hope - we are without any sense of things ever getting better. In this desert, we often find ourselves out so far on the limb, the weight of our burden so great, hearing the cracking of the limb as it strains to keep us upright. We are "stuck" - we cannot go further out on the limb or turn back. This is indeed a most difficult desert to cross. Yet, the most hopeless place is often the place our faith begins to take flight!
In the desert of despair, we begin to look for solutions we often ignore when things are smooth sailing. Things like intimate prayer with our Maker - pouring out our hearts to him with eager desperation. In the moment of despair, don't we often find ourselves looking back to God? Did you catch that? We are looking "back" to God! It is an amazing thing, but despair often drives us back to God - maybe even without ever recognizing just how comfortable we had become without him!
- The desert of brokenness. The very thing we need in this desert is the very thing we have absolutely no ability to accomplish on our own. It is only by the restorative and regenerating touch of our God we cross this desert. We may be "broken" by a whole lot of things - bad relationships, words which have left us scarred, or just a series of bad choices which resulted in us being "undone" by life.
In the desert of brokenness, we need "repair", don't we? What we drink the most freely of in this desert is God's grace. It is indeed a refreshing and restorative "drink".
Regardless of the desert, look again at our passage. The purpose of the desert is to cause us to hunger and thirst. Hunger for the best, thirst for what will refresh truly. We may have a lot of desert-crossing in our days. Just remember this: No desert is without hunger or thirst of some kind. What we do with the hunger or thirst determines the outcome of the desert-crossing!
Saturday, June 30, 2012
The Desert of Grief
When I was a kid, I loved reading the Reader's Digest. I had two favorite sections - "Laughter is the Best Medicine" and "Humor in Uniform". Both are lighthearted short stories intended to bring a smile to your face and a little cheer to your day. I guess I was attracted to these sections in the magazine because they made me laugh. In fact, I gravitate toward laughter! I find it is like a magnet to my soul. Whenever I hear a group of folks laughing, it lifts my spirits - almost releasing some type of hidden "energy" within. Much happens with laughter - medically speaking. Yet, laughter can conceal a great deal of hurt behind it!
Laughter can conceal a heavy heart, but when the laughter ends, the grief remains. (Proverbs 14:13 NLT)
Did you know the average person laughs somewhere around 15-20 times a day? If you are considering a face-lift due to a few sagging facial muscles, you might consider getting a steady dose of laughter each day! In laughter, we contract not less than 15 facial muscles! Do it often enough and you'd save a bunch on botox! Did you also know laughter makes our brains work a little harder? In fact, there is so much "brain activity" involved in laughter, we almost are "exercising" our brains to laugh! We use our frontal lobe to make an emotional response to the joke, our right half of the brain to actually break the joke down well enough to "get" it, the left side to analyze the words as they are spoken, and sensory and motor sections of the brain are also involved as we throw ourselves into a good bought of laughter! That's a workout!
The average person laughs because they find something funny. Yet, there are times when we laugh because we are tense and feeling very nervous. It is kind of a weird response of our body, is it not? The majority of our laughter is probably invoked because we find some "relief" in it. It is similar to a "pressure valve" - allowing us to "let off" some of the heaviness and seriousness of our day.
Now, back to our scripture. Laughter can conceal a heavy heart - yet, in the end there is grief which remains as a heavy cloud. As I am aging, I see many friends faced with physical challenges in their own lives and those of their loved ones. It just seems as we get over 50, many of our friends (and maybe even ourselves) begin to experience changes in our physical bodies - whether it be disease, deterioration, or a tragic event. In the end, the results are probably pretty similar - we mourn our losses. We don't have to be aging to experience grief, though. There is the grief which comes because of wrong activity choices, or the grief accompanying wrong relationship decisions. Regardless of the specific cause, we often find ourselves dealing with grief in our own unique manner - sometimes using laughter as a means of concealing it.
In considering some of the experiences of my own life, I look back at the times I "hid behind" way too much laughter - all the while doing little more than concealing my own grief and hurt. Lots of bad decisions as a youth led me to some not very honest or honorable activities. In the end, I left a whole lot of lives hurt in my wake. After getting really serious with God about my desire for a life change, I often found myself looking back at those I'd hurt - some still very much present in my life (like my mom and dad). In fact, I'd drift into times of remorse over my selfish, self-directed decisions and would deal with a whole lot of "grief" - some of it grief because of the pain I saw I caused them, but also the "grief" I gave myself (we call this shame).
I used laughter as a means of concealing the grief I felt so deeply over my failures - both those in my past and those in my present (because we don't change instantly - growth is a process and failure is part of growth). Grief is really another "emotion" of the brain - coming from our frontal lobe region (right there behind the forehead). Someone once said, "There is no way out of the desert except through it." Ugh! So, in order to get "out" of the desert of grief, I must cross "through" it! In order to be at a place where my laughter actually no longer is a cover-up for my grief, I must acknowledge I am actually in the desert! And...we rarely find much funny IN the desert!
The desert is a barren place - dry, crusty, and without much relief from the "heat" of the day. In order to escape the dryness, to avoid the "crustiness" of the desert, I need to cross over some pretty "hot" places! This is how it is with our grief - we move from one really emotionally "charged" place to another - until we come out on the other side. When we become a little more honest about the place we "are" (in the desert of emotional grief) instead of hiding behind our laughter, we sometimes find we make it to the other side just a little quicker! Why? Perhaps it is because change begins at the point of acknowledgement. We begin something knew only when we realize the "old" wasn't working!
I am not sure if I am touching anyone today with these words, but just know this - you don't walk this desert alone. You are in the midst of a really dry patch right now. You feel like everywhere you turn, things are just crusty as all get-out! You cannot see any end to the "desert" of your grief. My challenge to you - acknowledge it! I found something this morning which sums it up well: "There can be no knowledge without emotion. We may be aware of a truth, yet until we have felt its force, it is not ours. To the cognition of the brain must be added the experience of the soul." (Arnold Bennett) Your soul is experiencing much - not just your brain. In the end, you will come across your "desert". In the end, your laughter will no longer conceal, but will be a means of relief! Hallelujah!
Laughter can conceal a heavy heart, but when the laughter ends, the grief remains. (Proverbs 14:13 NLT)
Did you know the average person laughs somewhere around 15-20 times a day? If you are considering a face-lift due to a few sagging facial muscles, you might consider getting a steady dose of laughter each day! In laughter, we contract not less than 15 facial muscles! Do it often enough and you'd save a bunch on botox! Did you also know laughter makes our brains work a little harder? In fact, there is so much "brain activity" involved in laughter, we almost are "exercising" our brains to laugh! We use our frontal lobe to make an emotional response to the joke, our right half of the brain to actually break the joke down well enough to "get" it, the left side to analyze the words as they are spoken, and sensory and motor sections of the brain are also involved as we throw ourselves into a good bought of laughter! That's a workout!
The average person laughs because they find something funny. Yet, there are times when we laugh because we are tense and feeling very nervous. It is kind of a weird response of our body, is it not? The majority of our laughter is probably invoked because we find some "relief" in it. It is similar to a "pressure valve" - allowing us to "let off" some of the heaviness and seriousness of our day.
Now, back to our scripture. Laughter can conceal a heavy heart - yet, in the end there is grief which remains as a heavy cloud. As I am aging, I see many friends faced with physical challenges in their own lives and those of their loved ones. It just seems as we get over 50, many of our friends (and maybe even ourselves) begin to experience changes in our physical bodies - whether it be disease, deterioration, or a tragic event. In the end, the results are probably pretty similar - we mourn our losses. We don't have to be aging to experience grief, though. There is the grief which comes because of wrong activity choices, or the grief accompanying wrong relationship decisions. Regardless of the specific cause, we often find ourselves dealing with grief in our own unique manner - sometimes using laughter as a means of concealing it.
In considering some of the experiences of my own life, I look back at the times I "hid behind" way too much laughter - all the while doing little more than concealing my own grief and hurt. Lots of bad decisions as a youth led me to some not very honest or honorable activities. In the end, I left a whole lot of lives hurt in my wake. After getting really serious with God about my desire for a life change, I often found myself looking back at those I'd hurt - some still very much present in my life (like my mom and dad). In fact, I'd drift into times of remorse over my selfish, self-directed decisions and would deal with a whole lot of "grief" - some of it grief because of the pain I saw I caused them, but also the "grief" I gave myself (we call this shame).
I used laughter as a means of concealing the grief I felt so deeply over my failures - both those in my past and those in my present (because we don't change instantly - growth is a process and failure is part of growth). Grief is really another "emotion" of the brain - coming from our frontal lobe region (right there behind the forehead). Someone once said, "There is no way out of the desert except through it." Ugh! So, in order to get "out" of the desert of grief, I must cross "through" it! In order to be at a place where my laughter actually no longer is a cover-up for my grief, I must acknowledge I am actually in the desert! And...we rarely find much funny IN the desert!
The desert is a barren place - dry, crusty, and without much relief from the "heat" of the day. In order to escape the dryness, to avoid the "crustiness" of the desert, I need to cross over some pretty "hot" places! This is how it is with our grief - we move from one really emotionally "charged" place to another - until we come out on the other side. When we become a little more honest about the place we "are" (in the desert of emotional grief) instead of hiding behind our laughter, we sometimes find we make it to the other side just a little quicker! Why? Perhaps it is because change begins at the point of acknowledgement. We begin something knew only when we realize the "old" wasn't working!
I am not sure if I am touching anyone today with these words, but just know this - you don't walk this desert alone. You are in the midst of a really dry patch right now. You feel like everywhere you turn, things are just crusty as all get-out! You cannot see any end to the "desert" of your grief. My challenge to you - acknowledge it! I found something this morning which sums it up well: "There can be no knowledge without emotion. We may be aware of a truth, yet until we have felt its force, it is not ours. To the cognition of the brain must be added the experience of the soul." (Arnold Bennett) Your soul is experiencing much - not just your brain. In the end, you will come across your "desert". In the end, your laughter will no longer conceal, but will be a means of relief! Hallelujah!
Sunday, March 25, 2012
A tear or two
There is a saying which goes something like, "If I didn't laugh, I'd cry!" Golda Meir said, "Those who do not know how to weep with their whole heart don't know how to laugh either." One of the most popular columns in the Reader's Digest is the "Laughter is the Best Medicine" feature. Why is it we enjoy laughter more than tears? Maybe our answer is found in our passage today.
A cheerful disposition is good for our health! Sadness leaves us feeling like we have been wrung out and left to dry out like a washrag. Ever see a dried washrag? It is brittle, stinky, and pretty inflexible! No wonder we enjoy the laughter so much!
There is an old Jewish proverb which goes, "What soap is for the body, tears are for the soul." Think on this one for a moment. Tears have a real "cathartic" effect, don't they? We may feel a little "wrung out" for a while, but there is definitely something "cleansing" in having shed those tears. William Shakespeare reminds us, "To weep is to make less the depth of grief." So, tears are really not a bad thing.
So, why is it we prefer laughter to tears? Go again to our passage - the clue lies in the word "disposition". You see, it is not the tears which do us in, it is the disposition! The prevailing "tendency" of our spirit is what determines either the sense of release, or the turmoil of remaining under an overwhelming burden. When the "tendency" of our spirit is consistently submitted to God's will and his love, even the tears of sorrow can leave us liberated!
Laughter is a good thing indeed. I enjoy a good belly-splitting laugh now and again. The kind which leaves you with tears leaking from your eyes and your side hurting. There is nothing as enjoyable as sharing some laughter with a friend. In fact, to make light of a "faux-pas" is often the most delightful release!
Disposition is everything. How we approach life's challenges is based on our disposition - the "set of our spirit". It is truly a sad thing to be so weighed down by life's griefs until it affects the very bones of our frame! Yet, there are many who carry loads beyond their bearing - all because they choose a disposition which holds onto their grief instead of letting it go!
Why do you think the scriptures warn against holding onto unforgiveness? Easy! It affects our disposition of spirit! We call its effect "bitterness" - it makes us "sour" on people, life, and sometimes God. Why does scripture advise not to turn our backs on wise counsel? Simple! Unwise counsel trips us up and gets us down on ourselves. Gloom and doom leave you "bone-tired". As a nurse, I know this to be a fact. I see many a "worn-out" soul carrying many a burden beyond their capacity - all because they cannot let it go!
As some food for thought today, here's one final quote: "Time engraves our faces with all the tears we have not shed." (Natalie Clifford Barney) What is your face telling you about your disposition? Maybe it is time for a little release of what we have kept so deeply pent up for some time!
22 A cheerful disposition is good for your health; gloom and doom leave you bone-tired. (Proverbs 17:22 The Message)
A cheerful disposition is good for our health! Sadness leaves us feeling like we have been wrung out and left to dry out like a washrag. Ever see a dried washrag? It is brittle, stinky, and pretty inflexible! No wonder we enjoy the laughter so much!
There is an old Jewish proverb which goes, "What soap is for the body, tears are for the soul." Think on this one for a moment. Tears have a real "cathartic" effect, don't they? We may feel a little "wrung out" for a while, but there is definitely something "cleansing" in having shed those tears. William Shakespeare reminds us, "To weep is to make less the depth of grief." So, tears are really not a bad thing.
So, why is it we prefer laughter to tears? Go again to our passage - the clue lies in the word "disposition". You see, it is not the tears which do us in, it is the disposition! The prevailing "tendency" of our spirit is what determines either the sense of release, or the turmoil of remaining under an overwhelming burden. When the "tendency" of our spirit is consistently submitted to God's will and his love, even the tears of sorrow can leave us liberated!
Laughter is a good thing indeed. I enjoy a good belly-splitting laugh now and again. The kind which leaves you with tears leaking from your eyes and your side hurting. There is nothing as enjoyable as sharing some laughter with a friend. In fact, to make light of a "faux-pas" is often the most delightful release!
Disposition is everything. How we approach life's challenges is based on our disposition - the "set of our spirit". It is truly a sad thing to be so weighed down by life's griefs until it affects the very bones of our frame! Yet, there are many who carry loads beyond their bearing - all because they choose a disposition which holds onto their grief instead of letting it go!
Why do you think the scriptures warn against holding onto unforgiveness? Easy! It affects our disposition of spirit! We call its effect "bitterness" - it makes us "sour" on people, life, and sometimes God. Why does scripture advise not to turn our backs on wise counsel? Simple! Unwise counsel trips us up and gets us down on ourselves. Gloom and doom leave you "bone-tired". As a nurse, I know this to be a fact. I see many a "worn-out" soul carrying many a burden beyond their capacity - all because they cannot let it go!
As some food for thought today, here's one final quote: "Time engraves our faces with all the tears we have not shed." (Natalie Clifford Barney) What is your face telling you about your disposition? Maybe it is time for a little release of what we have kept so deeply pent up for some time!
Thursday, September 29, 2011
Ummm...can you say "depressed"?
11 Why are you down in the dumps, dear soul? Why are you crying the blues?
Fix my eyes on God—soon I'll be praising again.
He puts a smile on my face. He's my God.
Fix my eyes on God—soon I'll be praising again.
He puts a smile on my face. He's my God.
(Psalm 42:11)
There are a variety of psalms written by David that carry almost the same theme of desperation - intense desire to see God intervene in his life, some tragedy making his life almost unbearable, some sin keeping him out of fellowship with his creator. This one has some "meat" to it that I'd like to explore this morning. David is lamenting over his circumstances - over his downtrodden disposition. In other words, he is pretty well down-in-the-mouth - depressed beyond measure. He is mourning over something or someone - the impression is that he has lost out on something in his life and he is in a deep, deep depression as a result.
He begins with the idea of being thirsty. He desires to drink God in afresh. Have you ever been so thirsty that you just guzzle down the fluids? In Arizona, one of the dangers of working outdoors in the heat is that you get dehydrated quite easily. You just plug along with your work without any real recognition of how much fluid you need to replace in order to keep up with your body's sweating. If you don't replace it fast enough, and frequently enough, you end up with the condition we call "dehydration".
Dehydration is a process of excessive loss! That is what David has experienced - excessive loss - and it has left him feeling totally "parched" so that he desires nothing more than to drink in God afresh! He has even had a change in his diet! He states, "I am on a diet of tears - tears for breakfast, tears for supper!" David is in a place of severe depression. His sadness is greater than he can endure alone. His loss is leading him to feel this prolonged "void" in his life - and it is tearing him up!
As with most of us, when we are feeling particularly "lost" and like there is a huge "void" in our lives, we do some "recollection" of the past. We call this rehearsing our memories. That is exactly what David tells us that he does. He says, "These things I go over and over, emptying out the pockets of my life." The tendency to rehearse the things we have once been able to count on is not unusual. We are people of "memories" - we count on our memories to sustain us in the hard times. David says that his best memories are of those times when God central in his life - square in the middle, causing him to be at the head of the pack in giving praise and worship to his creator.
The key to David's lament in this chapter is really found in his revelation of what he does when he finds he is down in the dumps - when grief has overtaken him and his life seems to be circling the drain! He says, "When my soul is in the dumps, I rehearse everything I know of you!" He focuses on all that he knows about his creator - rehearsing it over and over again. The fact is, when we begin to rehearse what we know about God, we have a change of heart! Our heart is affected by our thoughts - in turn, our emotional "affect" is changed!
David makes the admission that most of us have made at one point or another in our lives - "God, I think you've let me down!" We ask the "why" questions. Why did you let this happen? Why do good people die? Why does bad stuff happen to good people? The list goes on. In plain language, he admits to God that he equates his present situation to God letting him down. The revelation he comes to in his rehearsal of all he knows about God is that God NEVER lets his kids down!
He gives us the anchor we need in the verses we consider today as our meditation verses. "Fix your eyes on God - soon you'll be praising again!" We may not praise out of a sense of joy for what we have gone through or experienced - but because of the faithfulness of our God to bring us through to the other side! When we are fixed on God, we cannot drift further into our depression. When he is our anchor, the circumstances may come, but we are held firmly in place!
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