In fact, I used to bend over backwards to be or do what another wanted. I wasn't true to myself at all. I became who they wanted me to be - losing my identity in the process. I believed they saw me a certain way because they treated me a certain way. The truth is that their actions didn't accurately reflect who I was or who I was becoming in Christ Jesus. We can go through life always believing ourselves to be who we are through the eyes of another, but there is not great wisdom in that kind of existence. We might not always 'like' who we are at the moment, but God isn't finished with us. The only eyes that really reflect our true identity and 'character qualities' are God's. We need to stop trying to 'measure up' to another's opinion of us.
Become true to the character and qualities of personality that God has created within you. Romans 12:1-2 reminds us, "...to give your bodies to God because of all he has done for you. Let them be a living and holy sacrifice—the kind he will find acceptable. This is truly the way to worship him. Don’t copy the behavior and customs of this world, but let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think. Then you will learn to know God’s will for you, which is good and pleasing and perfect." We can go through life trying to 'live up to' the expectations of others - the way they see us - or we can turn our eyes fully upon Christ and trust him to make us into the person he desires us to become.
When we are treated in ways we don't deserve - press in deeper to God's presence and experience his peace. When words cut to the quick of our soul - turn to God's Word and take in the many 'love words' he shares with us there. When another's opinion of you isn't 'top notch' in their eyes - listen instead to how God sees you. There is more truth in his view of you than there is in a thousand words for that one who speaks in ways that hurt you! Just sayin!