Nope, not going there

I once heard it said climbing a hill is a great challenge, until you recognize there is just another hill beyond that one, and another, and another, and so on. The hills just never really stop - even the flattest of places is marked by some spot that makes another a little higher or lower than the other. Hills are not 'high places' all the time. Sometimes they are our 'lowest'! Ever run across an individual that just seems contrary in all they do? There is just no pleasing them because they find fault with everything and love to quarrel over the smallest or lowest of things. There is a word for these type of individuals - fools! A fool loves to pick a fight - to find a hill and then mark out one's stand upon it. It is a mark of honor (of good character) to avoid a fight. I am not implying that we actually live in a state of existence where we go through life without ever saying a cross word or entering into constructive debate periodically. Yet, a man or woman of good character knows that insisting on a quarrel is never a sign of wisdom.

It's a mark of good character to avert quarrels, but fools love to pick fights.  (Proverbs 20:3)

It is a good thing to overlook the small things in life - the offenses that could become huge mountains upon which debates lead to wars. There is a saying I heard some time ago that has stuck with me: "Is this the hill you want to die on?" In other words, is this the "battle" of the will, or warfare of the mind that you want to engage in? "Small things" lead to the bigger battles and most damaging of forces when we allow ourselves to dwell upon them. Angry outbursts and quarrels are most often the result of not being willing to overlook an offense. God honors the one who is able to turn away from fighting and to be a peacemaker. It is probably the toughest job in the world to be a peacemaker, but one that not only honors God, but points others toward him.

Life well-lived isn't all about us not having the opportunity to quarrel, it is that we "avert" from that opportunity. To 'avert' carries both the idea of turning away before you enter into the quarrel and to prevent it before it has an opportunity to begin. This is more than the "counting to ten" thing that some may encourages us to engage in (not to say that this is bad). It is the attitude of mind and heart that shows how much you value the other individual - so much so that you don't see the hill as something to be mounted in victory, but rather as something that will come between you both if you do! When we "turn away" or "turn aside" from a quarrel, we are choosing to honor God by not engaging in actions or the sharing of words that will not represent God well.

When we prevent a quarrel, we actually are doing what God calls being a peacemaker. A peacemaker is an intermediary - one who is able to see both sides of the coin. There is an ability to not judge a situation by face value, but to see that there are always two sides to how a situation can be interpreted (each being valid in the other person's eyes). Think on that one today - your interpretation of the situation may not be that of the other individual - we each see that hill a little differently. Today, we have a choice - it is to choose wisely the hills that we are willing to die on. Quarrelsome behavior will soon wear us down, wear upon our relationships, and make us devoid of those strong supports we need in life. Choose wisely - it is better to be numbered with the wise than with the fools! Just sayin!

Don't you see the light?

In everything you do, stay away from complaining and arguing so that no one can speak a word of blame against you. You are to live clean, innocent lives as children of God in a dark world full of people who are crooked and stubborn. Shine out among them like beacon lights, holding out to them the Word of Life.  (Philippians 2:14-15 TLB)

True confessions here...sometimes my "beacon" gets a little fogged over by my complaints and verbal agonizing over things not going my way, or that I just simply don't like. It is easy to slip into the complaint-mode, even kind of "second-nature" to some of us. Complaint takes on the issue as something we will "lament" or "object to". It is a subtle form of criticism that sometimes carries with it the idea we have been "wronged" or "put upon" as a result of someone else's actions. To be truthful with you, most of the complaining we do really doesn't accomplish a doggone thing, and may even make us more discontent than the original action did!

We are told to "shine out" as a beacon of light - holding out to all the Word of Life. Shining requires a degree of awareness to our own responses that we sometimes aren't all that keen on developing. I know I feel a certain "tug" in my spirit whenever I drift into the "complaint lane" in life. It is as though the Holy Spirit is saying, "You don't really want to go down that path, do you?" At times it easier to just go along with the crowd than it is to stand up for what we know to be true or right. At others, it is just easier to complain about what we don't understand, or maybe something that gives us a little bit of trepidation. 

Regardless of how we get into the "complaint lane" - by drifting slowly into it, or making a conscious decision to just get into it directly - we find our ability to be a 'beacon' gets a little less effective because people don't want to be around others who complain (or argue) all that much. Sure, there are pockets of people drawn to complaining and arguing - because it is in our nature to follow this course when we don't get our own way. Most of us would rather live above the conflict, though. God hears our complaints - even those spoken under our breath! 

I'd like us to realize something this morning - we shine a light one way or the other. If we avoid the complaining and arguing, we are shining the light in one direction. If we are giving into the complaining and/or arguing, we are still shining a light - it is just toward a different direction. The important thing to keep in mind is that others see the light - they are drawn to it because that is what light does. If it is shining in the right direction, the movement toward the light is less likely to cause others to be "tripped up" along the way. If it is shining in the wrong direction, the light may illuminate the pitfalls, but if that is the only path another sees, they may take it anyway! Maybe this is why we are reminded not to go down the path that encourages others to follow where they may stumble, too.  Just sayin!

Airheads beware!

Have you ever had those little candies called "Slammin' Sour Airheads"?  They are little strips of candy, but they pack a huge punch!  The "sourness" of the candy is enough to set everyone of your taste buds into full alert!  I think this might be what Solomon had in mind when he penned these words:


A person who talks sense is honored; airheads are held in contempt.  (Proverbs 12:8 The Message)


Airheads often speak without thinking - just blurting out whatever will "stimulate" the senses of the ones in hearing distance.  They don't care about the "shock-factor" of their words - indeed, they probably strive for it!  In the good old days, the term "airhead" used to refer to the "airspace" the enemy occupied in order to do air drops of more troops or supplies into the midst of the fight.  Hmmm...now doesn't this give us an interesting perspective on our "airhead" in the passage?  They are actually putting more "resource" into the fight!


Don't get me wrong, sometimes we need to hear something which will stir us up from our place of slumber.  Airheads may begin this process, but if all we listen to is their rantings, we will soon be drifting into the negativity of the masses.  Look at what Solomon describes as their fate - they are held in contempt.  In other words, there words soon come to be worthless.  They speak, but nobody really pays them any mind.  The sad part of this is we don't realize the "airspace" they are given in the first place is what opens the doors for them to gain a stronghold!


On the other hand, we are reminded about the person who "talks sense".  There is something about trying to talk to an "airhead" - someone who packs a huge punch, setting everyone on full alert - we must learn from this passage.  First, we control their "airspace" - we don't give them an inch!  If we control what we allow to be spoken in our "airspace", we control what can gain "influence" in our minds.


Second, we don't give credence to what is spoken - unless we check it out first! The words were spoken to make an "impact" - pure and simple.  The "impact" may leave a crater the size of the Grand Canyon if we give too much credence!


Sometimes the best defense is a good offense.  We often think cannot "counter" the words of the "airhead" with anything that will impact the situation.  Their words just hang there like stale air.  I have a can of this wonderful stuff called "Neutra Air" - a Lysol product which eliminates the "bad air".  It doesn't just put out a pretty smell, it actually eliminates it!  Sometimes what we need to do is "eliminate" the "bad air" with some "good air" of our own!  


The best defense is a good offense - the best offense is the Word of God.  Nothing shuts down the "sourness" of the airhead any quicker than the gentle reply of one "tempered" by the Word of God.  I am not saying you quote a scripture, but you let the scripture "temper" your response - so it is in gentleness, love, kindness, and with boldness.  In turn, you almost "close off" the airhead's "airspace".  


Just some thoughts on dealing with an airhead!

No complaining or arguing!

¹⁴ Do everything without complaining and arguing, ¹⁵ so that no one can criticize you. Live clean, innocent lives as children of God, shining like bright lights in a world full of crooked and perverse people. ¹⁶ Hold firmly to the word of life...

(Philippians 2:14-16)

Nothing delights God more than to look at his children and see purity of heart, purity in our actions, and purity in our words.  Some might think of this as being "blameless".  A true servant will never hesitate to put his heart into his service.  No child of God should think that this walk we call Christianity will require anything less.

Paul's emphasis on being "one in spirit" is foundational to impacting the world with our testimony.  Unity - being able to love one another - not for what the other can do for you, but because there is a heart determined to live in love with the other, is not the easiest challenge.  When we finally understand the purpose God has for us, we understand the purpose of aligning with others that will spur us on to fulfill that purpose.

The idea of living clean, innocent lives seems far-fetched in this perverse world.  We are surrounded by all kinds of evil - we don't have to look far to be inundated with reports of wars, murders, senseless crimes of passion, etc.  The nature and attitude of Christ while he walked this earth was to confront these things head on.  He did not turn his back to the hurting - he embraced them.  We need to be open to being a light without being consumed by the darkness.

The key is "connection" - first with God, then with others who are in love with Jesus.  This connection with his Father gave him the ability to live obediently - to draw from the resources God provides.  We need to learn to "tap our resources" as frequently as he did.  As our example, he modeled the behavior of a servant, a child who relies upon his father, and as a brother who spurs another on to holy living.

Two things that God explains through Paul that will set us out as unique from this world - a lack of complaining and the purposeful refusal to enter into arguments.  Complaining is important to maintaining unity because whenever we complain, we are saying that we want the attention of others to be on us.  It uses energy that we don't have at our disposal to be frivolously wasted.  The capping effect of complaining is that it usually ends in the destruction (the tearing down or apart) of someone else's reputation.  

Not arguing is important because of how arguments usually end - somebody gets hurt.  Our outbursts, however infrequent they may be, are really because we want to be right (we want to win).  It is a hard thing to lay down our right to be right!  Usually, in the argument, one may think they have won, but in actuality, no one really wins when the means to "winning" was in arguing.  The need to win is selfish - God's desire is unity and unity is founded on being able to lay down our self.

The last thought I have today is the final words of this passage:  Hold firmly to the word of life.  The spirit of unity is often exposed in the word of God.  We need to get it into us, allowing it to affect our desire to complain, our need to argue, and are desire to be noticed first.  As we do, unity is possible.  Apart from the word of God acting in our lives, we remain the same self-directed, self-centered individuals.  Unity is only possible in submission and obedience to the principles taught in scripture.  I understand the word of God best when I see it modeled - therefore, I need others around me that also want the word to deeply affect their lives.  As I see the word modeled, I am able to imagine it possible in my life, as well.  We fulfill the purpose of "spurring one another on" in this faith walk!  Live well!