Abandoned obedience

 I remember being a 'new mom', reading all the books I could get my hands on in order to understand how the life within was taking form, what was happening to my body, and how to prepare for that 'big day' when she would make her debut in this big, big world. That was years ago now, but when I allow my mind to drift back to those times, I can recall some of the excitement combined with fear as we readied our home for her arrival. I'd have to admit, as much as I 'read up' on it all, I was really not prepared for those first few weeks without sleep, the long nights walking the floors, let alone the number of diaper changes, spit-ups that required clothing changes, or the inability to figure out what those cries meant! Trying to figure out all that stuff and get enough time to shower, squeeze in some much needed rest, and still find time to make meals, wash clothes, and clean the bathroom - it seemed as complex as it must be to obtain one's PhD!

Just as you’ll never understand the mystery of life forming in a pregnant woman, so you’ll never understand the mystery at work in all that God does. (Ecclesiastes 11:5)

The mystery of what God is doing 'in us' is sometimes as confusing and 'daunting' as being a 'new mom'. We think we can 'read up' on how he works and then we will have it all figured out, but let me burst your bubble on that one - I have been 'reading up' since the age of about 13 and in those 50 years, I still don't have him all 'figured out'! God just 'is' and that can be the hardest thing for some of us to wrap our heads around. We don't understand that he had no beginning, nor do we understand how he can have no end. He is. Our 'natural minds' can have a truly hard time trying to 'figure that one out'. How does someone exist before anything else existed? That must remain a mystery to me, I am afraid, but it doesn't dissuade me in my trust in the fact he exists!

Are there things you are trusting God for in your life? Do you understand how he will accomplish those things? Sure, you might think you have him figured out, knowing pretty much how he will 'do' whatever it is you need to have 'done', but do you really understand all that is behind what he is doing? If you get truthful here, you'd have to admit God does things and you have no idea he has even been at work! As hard as it is to understand his working within us, it can be equally as hard to understand his working within another. I have tried to figure out how he works in others in order to figure out how he goes about working in me and do you know what I figured out? He doesn't do it the same way in me!

The books I read that challenge me to consider God's best for my life are indeed excellently written and the experiences of the authors come across very well. The words may prompt me to take action and to even attempt to 'emulate' what they have done. I try to imitate their actions and hope the results will be equally as amazing. Let me just stop us there. Our 'imitated actions' are not what God is looking for. When we read the things that challenge us, God's greatest hope is that we will ask him how he can use those words to trigger or spark something within us that will begin to 'develop' something we need within our lives. It isn't that we will imitate those actions, expecting the same results. It is that we will trust him to take what we have gleaned and use those truths to bring us close enough to him to hear what he is about to do within us if we will just trust him with abandoned obedience.

I guess the main thing God needs from each of us more than anything else is the willingness to abandon what we think we have figured out and trust him with the very big stuff we really haven't even considered yet! Just sayin!