Never enough

Does your ego every get the best of you? Do you find yourself having to 'put forward' something great you have accomplished just so others know you have accomplished it? If this is a tendency in your life, you are not alone. There are bunches and bunches of us that have been caught up in that trap from time to time. We get so focused on whatever it is we have accomplished and then we want everyone to know we have done it! We find ourselves prouder than can be and we want everyone to know it. Impressions only are made once - isn't there some kind of statement as to that truth? Doesn't it go something like, "You only get one chance to make a first impression?" Well, what impression have you been trying to make with God? Do you honestly think he finds your 'first impression' all that great? If you are like me, the first impression you put forward to him was a 'fake one' because you were ashamed by the real one!

What actually took place is this: I tried keeping rules and working my head off to please God, and it didn’t work. So I quit being a “law man” so that I could be God’s man. Christ’s life showed me how, and enabled me to do it. I identified myself completely with him. Indeed, I have been crucified with Christ. My ego is no longer central. It is no longer important that I appear righteous before you or have your good opinion, and I am no longer driven to impress God. Christ lives in me. The life you see me living is not “mine,” but it is lived by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me. I am not going to go back on that. Is it not clear to you that to go back to that old rule-keeping, peer-pleasing religion would be an abandonment of everything personal and free in my relationship with God? I refuse to do that, to repudiate God’s grace. If a living relationship with God could come by rule-keeping, then Christ died unnecessarily. (Galatians 2:20 MSG)

When we identify completely with Christ, allowing him to be the central focus of our lives, we find what is 'put forward' isn't us, but it is him! We don't need to make the first impression on our own merit any longer. It is him in us that is seen - this life we live now "in Christ" is kind of different because we don't have to impress God to have an audience with him! We have an audience with him because of who lives within us! The things we think of us as giving us a good reputation are really nothing compared to the indescribable work of grace within our lives when Jesus takes control of who we are and what we are doing.

The very essence of ego is based upon a focus that requires us to put forward something that will dazzle or impress others. "WE" need to be central in their eyes and therefore, WE put ourselves forward for all to see. The truth is that there isn't much good in me apart from Christ. That may seem a little harsh to some, but I know it to be true in my life. I am not going to sugar-coat this one for you, because there is nothing good that comes out of putting things out there that aren't true. The fact of the matter is that apart from Christ, no good thing dwells within me. It is his life living within me that makes what I do and how I do it 'good'. 

Goodness is God's gift - it is a result of his grace refining our otherwise a little too self-focused lives into somewhat of a beautiful thing. Apart from his life within, the only hope we have is to continually try to do 'enough', be 'good enough', get 'enough', and in the end, never really find 'enough is enough'. The freedom that comes from living the life Christ calls us to live is that 'never enough' takes a backseat - because we have 'all that is enough' in him. Just sayin!

Ego-centric?

Some of us have no problem pointing out the insincere action of others, but let them point out one of ours and watch out!  That's meddling!  There is one bumper sticker which absolutely drives me nuts, not so much because the message is incorrect, but because so many people see it as a way of excusing bad behavior.  Wonder what that sticker says?  "Christians aren't perfect, just forgiven!"  Yep, you got it!  I think some of our friends in this wide world in which we drive see this as an excuse for our continued behavior, more than reading the underlying truth within the saying.  Yet, if we look closely at scripture, we see Paul saying just about the same thing, but just with more words.

Have some of you noticed that we are not yet perfect? (No great surprise, right?) And are you ready to make the accusation that since people like me, who go through Christ in order to get things right with God, aren’t perfectly virtuous, Christ must therefore be an accessory to sin? The accusation is frivolous. If I was “trying to be good,” I would be rebuilding the same old barn that I tore down. I would be acting as a charlatan.  (Galations 2:7-8 MSG)

Paul says it well - we go through Christ in or the get things right with God - but we aren't perfectly virtuous in all our behavior yet.  We have a ways to go, huh?  We don't always rise to the occasion as it applies to being morally excellent and upright in our behavior.  For some, this is all the proof they need to accuse us of our walk not matching our talk.

The truth is, none of us "in Christ" believers are at the point of perfection yet.  We have been "made" perfect through Christ, but it is in the day-to-day walking out of our salvation (called sanctification) where we see each imperfection become less and less of a pattern in our lives.  One day, we see permanent and lasting change in areas of previous struggle.  It didn't come all at once, but in what seemed like tiny and tedious steps.  Most of the time, obedience is nothing more than a series of very small steps!

Paul goes on to say, "My ego is no longer central. It is no longer important that I appear righteous before you or have your good opinion, and I am no longer driven to impress God. Christ lives in me."  (vs. 20)  Perhaps the bumper sticker would more accurately read, "My ego gets in the way of me being all I say".  Looking again at what Paul writes to the Galations, he is speaking to them because they have been questioning the reality of the salvation experience - because there is still evidence of old actions in this new life.  Paul's emphasis on this point should give us a moment of pause.  It is not a new issue for believers to say one thing, and do another.

Why?  Our ego may no longer be central, but it is still definitely alive!  As long as my ego is active, I am subject to the "performance" of my ego.  I don't know about yours, but mine liked to cover faults, avoid being discovered for who I really was, and always presented an "all-together" image.  I don't know about you, but I came to a place where this just didn't work for me anymore!  I found it too burdensome to live this way.  I found myself "siding" with Paul - comfortable admitting my imperfect state, but confident in also admitting that my ego is being shifted into a submissive role in my life - not totally there yet, but shifting nonetheless.  

It is this "ego-shift" which really is the focus here.  We aren't perfect - but as long as our "ego" is central, Christ cannot be.  Make the shift from ego to Christ and life begins to change.  To understand our ego, we just need to think of it as what gives us our thinking, feeling, and willing.  Ego is the sum total of what we think, how we feel, and what we will to do.  Now, put this into our context of scripture today and you will see Paul is telling us there is some "deconstructing" going on.  Ego is learning to think differently, feelings are becoming less relied upon, and our wills are beginning to match up with the choices God would have us make.  Not instantly - but incrementally.

Yep, we aren't perfect - but we are headed in the right direction if ego is no longer central in our choices and actions!  In the meantime, we need a whole lot of forgiveness for each time "ego" gets stuff wrong.  Just sayin!