Temper it

A soft and gentle and thoughtful answer turns away wrath, but harsh and painful and careless words stir up anger. The tongue of the wise speaks knowledge that is pleasing and acceptable, but the [babbling] mouth of fools spouts folly. The eyes of the Lord are in every place, watching the evil and the good [in all their endeavors]. A soothing tongue [speaking words that build up and encourage] is a tree of life, but a perversive tongue [speaking words that overwhelm and depress] crushes the spirit. (Proverbs 14:1-4)

Just in case no one has ever told you this before, putting 'thought' into your words might take a bit more time, but it sure does a lot to improve your relationships. Think before you speak - words to live by, but harder to put into practice than one might imagine. If you are a 'babbler' - just talking and talking - then you likely have fallen prey to the traps all that babbling can create in your life. If you are a 'spouter' - saying the first thing that pops into your mind - you likely have been engaged in more than a few uncomfortable interactions over your lifetime. While the goal is to speak in a pleasing and acceptable manner ALL of the time, we know just how difficult that can be, don't we?

The wise learn to 'temper' their words - to use them wisely, sparingly, and with purpose. The harsh, painful, or careless words one may use do more damage than we might realize. Back in the day, moms used to tell us that words could never hurt us - not like the damage that sticks and stones could do. The origin of this 'taunt' was to encourage us to courageously continue in the face of opposition. As we all know, 'opposition' comes in various forms, but our response to it can vary. Sometimes we will jump in all that more, but at others, we will pull back, go into our shells, and walk away without moving forward. In general, words can hold us back or move us forward - regardless of their intent.

One of the most 'mature' prayers we can utter is to ask God to help us choose both the words we speak and the words we listen to with wisdom and purpose. Words that overwhelm and depress should not be our 'norm'. Words that built up and encourage are God's plan for our lives. God's eyes observe our conversations - that should give us pause each time we speak. Would it be what he would want us to say? Would it be what he wants to hear? Will it build up? Will it give another insight? Begin asking God to 'temper' your words, and you may just be surprised at how differently your words come out! Just sayin!