Letting Go

Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud or rude. It does not demand its own way. It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged. (I Corinthians 13:4-5 NLT)

Lewis B. Smedes reminds us, "To forgive is to set a prisoner free and discover the prisoner was you." We may not realize just how 'bound' we have become by holding onto those things we find 'hard to forgive' in others. It isn't that we don't want to forgive - it is that our memory keeps it front and center in our lives, making it hard to really let go.

Forgiveness doesn't mean we won't remember a slight against us. Some might think it means the pain we associate with the slight will begin to be less and less until one day it is there no longer. We won't really let go of the unforgiveness - it just doesn't bring us that same level of pain when we remember it. This isn't what God had in mind for us, though. He wants us to be both free of the pain AND the memory!

Keeping no record of wrongs is kind of a hard thing, isn't it? It means we have to 'stay current' in our relationships and that can be harder than we may think. It means one of us has to beat a path to the other's doorstep, seeking reconciliation, laying down our 'right to be hurt' so that we can find peace and love within the relationship once again. With all the hatred being spewed around us today, isn't it important that we keep those relationships we value strong and vitally growing?

Look at the things that lead to slights in relationships: Jealousy, Pride, Rudeness, Impatience, Unkindness. These are certainly not the traits of one who is deeply in love with Jesus. Yet we may encounter some in our daily dealings that aren't aware of how they are coming across to us. When we do, we can hold onto their rudeness or unkindness, dwelling on it over and over again. Or...we can take it to Jesus, lifting the one who has offended us up to him.

It is hard to hold onto an offense when we take it quickly to the Lord and ask him to begin to bless that other individual. Bless them? Yup, you read that right. The more deeply offended we are, the less we feel like the other person should be blessed, but in praying for a blessing in their lives, it is hard to hold onto those emotions we experienced when they offended us. In time, we release the other person right along with those sad, angry, hurt emotions. We are free and that is what God intends. Just sayin!